Early Modern Fantasy
by AnthroQueen
Summary: They could have gone to Vegas. They could have gone to the beach. But when discussing the ending destination of their road trip, there was only one obvious option- Disney World. Look out, Mickey. Here come the Greendale Seven.
1. Over the River

**Hello folks! So this was originally only going to be two, possibly three chapters and it was only going to be about the group's road trip. But then I thought about where they could go on said road trip and was like, "Oh my God. Disney World!" And then I thought about all of the wonderful possibilities of things that could happen to them at Disney World and suddenly, a full-length story was born. :)  
**

**I have it planned out and only a few chapters are written, so bear with me. It'll be ten chapters and, no, I obviously don't own anything. Enjoy!**

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Early Modern Fantasy

Chapter One: Over the River

"_Mickey's Montage- it's five a.m., June fifteenth is the date, and the sun is just about to rise on the seven brave souls preparing to take a three-day trek by car. The bags are piled high in the van built for eight as each near and dear friend waits anxiously for their trip to begin. Cameras are queued and ready for action. Snacks are packed beside each seat for easy access. Sunscreen and bathing suits are a must. Everyone is eager to pile into the vehicle and hit the road. Their only destination- adventure._"

"Abed," Jeff cuts off him off, rolling his eyes. "What did we say about the voiceover? I'm not listening to that the entire trip down."

Abed frowns, puts down his voice recorder and shakes his head. "Sorry. I forgot how much that annoys you."

"Well I think it's great," Annie grins cheerfully, lugging a pink-and-white polka dot suitcase behind her and pointing at it when she catches Jeff's eye. "That's the last one, I swear."

"Jeez Annie," Jeff grunts, heaving her suitcase into the back of the eight-passenger van. "You packed as if we were going for two months instead of two weeks."

"I have to be prepared for everything," She defends. "Plus, I brought the rest of the screened t-shirts that couldn't fit into Troy's bag."

"Screened t-shirts?" Britta asks skeptically, tossing a duffel bag and a backpack into the back of the van as well. "Oh no, we're not going to be like those cheesy family reunion groups, are we? Please tell me we don't have matching neon shirts."

But Troy and Abed share a grin and produce one of many brightly colored t-shirts, shouting, "Surprise!"

Jeff turns to Britta and asks, "Is it too late to back out of this?"

Their shirts all read the same message, only in different fonts for the different days and parks they would be attending: "Greendale Seven" is written in the loopy, bubbly Disney font and each member of the study group has their name screened on the back of their respective shirt. Rolling their eyes at the tackiness, Jeff and Britta load the remaining luggage into the rented van and take their seats inside, grumbling, but Shirley coos excitedly about how cute the shirts are and now they won't get separated in the parks because they'll be able to spot the shirts from a mile away. Pierce is last to arrive in Greendale's parking lot, where they're meeting to begin their trip, but when he does, he's packed surprisingly light. They'd all expected him to bring his entire mansion on their vacation.

Because the Greendale seven had had such a trying year, they decided, upon the completion of their junior year at Greendale , that they would take a trip together for a little summer vacation and, after much deliberation, they decided on Disney World. Disney Land was much closer, but Shirley and Abed had both been insistent that they experience Disney in its true form, and the real, original, and larger park was in Orlando, Florida. So, because Pierce had a fear of flying and didn't trust airline pilots ("Those bumbling idiots. You never know _what_ they're doing up there in the cockpit. Why do you think they call it a _cockpit_, anyway?"), they rented the largest vehicle Hertz Rental Cars had and decided to make the drive all the way down to Orlando. Yeah. They were in for a _real_ treat.

A little after five in the morning, with Pierce fumbling with his atlas and Jeff and Britta arguing over which highway would get them to the turnpike faster, Troy punches their destination into the GPS and they're off. Jeff mentions he needs his beauty rest and falls asleep against the window and Britta pokes fun at this for a good half an hour before she too falls asleep, much to everyone's relief. With Troy at the wheel and Annie as his copilot, that leaves Abed and Shirley in the middle and Jeff, Britta, and Pierce in the backseat. They've just left Greendale County when Shirley produces a small tin from her comically large bag.

"I brought muffins!" She says gleefully. "I know it's early still, but I'm sure everyone will be hungry for breakfast before you know it! There's blueberry, cinnamon, chocolate chip, and corn!"

"Ooh, I'll take a blueberry. Thank you, Shirley!" Annie squeals excitedly and when Troy shoots her a look, she turns back to Shirley and says, "So will Troy."

She simultaneously eats her muffin and feeds another to Troy, who, thankfully, doesn't take his hands off the wheel. Pierce, too, accepts a muffin, and eats quickly before complaining for a good half hour about how bored he is. Like a child, he asks Troy every ten minutes if they're there yet, and, like over-annoyed parents, Troy and Annie continuously shoot him down. He grumbles, "I don't have anything to do and my ass is going numb."

"Pierce," Shirley frowns. "We've only been in the car for an hour."

"Well people my age aren't meant for long car trips," He responds. "I'm too old for this shit."

"Cool, like Murtaugh," Abed grins. "Though, if you're like him, just because you say you're too old for it, doesn't mean you're going to stop doing it."

"Mur-who?" Pierce asks and then shakes his head. "See, I don't even get your references. I probably won't understand a single thing this entire trip."

Troy nearly stops the car in shock. "_You've never seen Lethal Weapon?_"

Annie pats his shoulder soothingly and turns around in her seat to face Pierce. "I'm sure you've seen a bunch of the movies they're going to reference, Pierce. A lot of them came out… a while ago."

"Didn't you go to school with Walt Disney?" Jeff yawns, half-awake now, and Pierce glares at him.

"For your information, Walt Disney is _dead_," Pierce informs Jeff and the rest of the group shares a 'what-does-that-have-to-do-with-anything?' look.

"Yeah, but I heard his body's sitting on ice somewhere," Troy says. "That's _got_ to be a rumor."

"No, I've heard he was cryogenically frozen and his body is stored beneath the Pirates of the Caribbean ride," Annie supplements. "But I doubt that's true. I mean he's been dead almost fifty years. They're not going to keep a frozen body under a _children's_ ride."

At this, Britta stirs, rubbing an eye blearily. "Why are we talking about dead, frozen bodies?"

Jeff, who's slipping out of consciousness again, responds, "We missed the conversation. Just go back to sleep, Britta."

"Mm, don't tell me what to do," She says, but does so anyway.

Annie looks slightly uneasy and tells Shirley, "I can't believe we signed ourselves up for two weeks of _that_."

"I know," Shirley nods curtly, agreeing. "I mean sometimes they can be cute, but most times they make me want to hit myself upside the head with a brick."

And so on they drive, with Pierce giving into his situation and falling asleep, much to everyone else's relief. Jeff and Britta are also still asleep, which helps everyone feel a tad bit better, considering they're not stuck in a confined space listening to the two of them banter. Annie takes a short cat nap herself and wakes up a little later to find Shirley passed out and Abed and Troy beat boxing back and forth and making up ridiculous raps about the signs on the side of the road they pass ("Slow! Construction workers up ahead! You better slow down, before they end up dead!", "Gas station in five miles, rest stop in two. Don't know why they're not together, that's why I'm asking you!", "Doing seventy in a sixty-five, yeah, I'm doing seventy in a sixty-five…"). She has to laugh, but she's really not shocked. This is Troy and Abed, after all.

A little after nine a.m., they pass the "Welcome to Kansas!" sign, and, of course, break into song per Abed's request. He begins, "_Somewhere over the rainbow, way up high. There's a land that I've heard of, once in a lullaby_."

Troy picks up as the occupants of the backseat begin to awaken. "_Somewhere over the rainbow, skies are blue. And the dreams that you dare to dream really do come true_."

"_Someday I'll wish upon a star,_" Annie continues as Shirley stirs behind her. "_And wake up where the clouds are far behind me. Where troubles melt, like lemon drops, away upon the chimney tops. That's where you'll find me._"

Shirley's barely awake, but awake enough for this. She sings, "_Somewhere over the rainbow, bluebirds fly. Birds fly over the rainbow. Why oh why can't I?_"

"_If happy little bluebirds fly_," Abed, Troy, Annie, and Shirley finish the song, to Jeff, Britta, and Pierce's chagrin. "_Beyond the rainbow, why oh why can't I?_"

They clap for themselves, not waiting for the backseat to do so, and Jeff asks, "Just so I'm prepared, how many _Wizard of Oz_ references can I expect while we're driving through Kansas?"

"Verdict?" Abed states. "Quite a few."

They pass a thruway that contains a candy shop and Annie, in the weirdest voice possible, begins to sing, _We represent the Lollipop Guild! The Lollipop Guild! The Lollipop Guild! And in the name of the Lollipop Guild, we wish to welcome you to Munchkinland!_ They see a billboard advertisement for an off-Broadway production of _Wicked_, and Abed and Shirley launch into, "_Ding dong, the Witch is dead! Which old witch? The Wicked Witch! Ding dong, the Wicked Witch is dead!_" And, once they get more inland, a little before eleven a.m., the weather starts to turn and the clouds ahead are getting thicker and greyer, which, of course, makes Troy shout, "It's a twister! It's a twister!"

Finally, Jeff groans and says, "Can we talk about something else? _Anything_ else?"

"Ooh!" Annie squeals, _Wizard of Oz_ forgotten momentarily as she rummages in her bag. "I brought Mad Libs!"

"Oh my God," Britta says outwardly. "I haven't done one of those since sixth grade. Everyone used to put swear words and vulgar parts of the body for all the answers."

"Really?" Troy asks, intrigued. "Because when I did them, we all just used to put 'poop' and 'fart'."

"Very mature," Shirley shakes her head.

Abed shrugs. "Might not be mature, but the comedic value _is_ higher, that way."

"Okay, who wants to go first?" Annie asks, but no one volunteers.

"How do you play?" Jeff asks apprehensively and everyone else glances at him skeptically.

"Jeff, really?" Troy wonders. "I mean, I know you're older than the rest of us, but you're not _ancient_."

He throws a sidelong glance at Pierce through the rearview mirror and Jeff scoffs. "I've heard of it, I've just never done them. Sue me."

"Okay," Abed nods. "But I have to know, as a former practitioner of the law, will you represent yourself in court?"

"Jeff, it's really easy," Britta explains. "It's like you're writing a story, only Annie has the storyline and you're supplying her the words. You'll give her a bunch of nouns and verbs and things and then when she's done copying them down, she'll read the story back to you and usually, it doesn't make any sense. That's why it's hilarious."

"Sounds ridiculously boring," He frowns but Annie's already got her purple pen poised.

"Okay your story's theme is 'A Gangsta Story'," She reads and they all laugh.

"Good, because Jeff could _not_ be any more gangsta," Troy states sarcastically and nearly cries with laughter.

But Annie ignores this and says, "Give me an animal."

"Any animal?" He asks and the brunette nods. "Um… a bear?"

She scribbles this down and says, "A noun."

"Seatbelt," Jeff says, drawing upon the things around him.

"A place."

"Kansas."

"A plural noun."

Eyeing Shirley's baking tin, he responds, "Muffins."

After a couple of minutes, Annie clears her throat and dons a gangsta voice to read Jeff's story. "Tommy the gangsta bear was walking up the street to his seatbelt in the Kansas. But just as he came inside he saw that all his gangsta muffins had been replaced with tough stuff. He was so mad that he kicked his elbow and fell into the broomstick. Then, when he got out he started searching all of the seatbelt. But after 5 hours of looking around he saw a speaker walking around with all his bling. So, Tommy stopped the fool, and tickled all the items that the speaker had stolen from him. "What`s your problem you middle watch! If you wanna be a gangsta buy your own bling, and clothes, don`t steal mine" Tommy recoiled. And then he went home and lived baldly ever after."

Shirley giggles but Jeff doesn't even have a slight smirk on his face. "That was stupid."

"Yeah, that one was kind of lame," Troy agrees, but still says joyfully, "My turn! My turn!"

Playing Mad Libs keeps the group occupied for about an hour and when they reach Salina, Kansas, they decide to stop for lunch. It's twelve thirty and when they all exit the vehicle, they're glad to stretch their cramped bodies after being crammed in a car for the past seven and a half hours. The restaurant they've stopped at is a twenty-four/seven diner that's fifties-themed, but aren't they all? They fill up on grilled cheese sandwiches and milkshakes, diner specialties, before hitting the bathrooms, walking around the diner a few times to get feeling back into their legs and feet, and then hitting the road again.

A few feet down the road from the diner is a gas station, which they stop at immediately to fill up for the next leg of their journey. Troy retires his driving skills for the day, but not before buying this tank of gas, panicking momentarily that perhaps people in Kansas didn't quite pump gas in the same way as they did in Colorado. Everyone tries to ignore this stupidity. Instead, Pierce uses the restroom again, Shirley pauses to call her family, and Annie sits behind the steering wheel, for it's her turn to drive the group onward. Jeff and Britta have entered the gas station to find sustenance to tide the group over until dinner and come out arguing over what they _should_ have bought. But they've got pretzels, trail mix, and a few boxes of candy and bottles of water, so they're good to go.

It's nearing two o'clock when they're on the road again, but Topeka isn't far away and it's their last major Kansas landmark before they leave the state for Missouri. Pierce falls asleep again, as he always does when there's a good meal in his stomach, and the group is glad that they don't have to listen to anymore of his whining. Shirley then leads the car in a group sing along and they go through all of the classics before landing on Jeff and Britta's all-time favorite- "99 Bottles of Beer on the Wall." They had all pitched in and sang the song for a while, but, obviously, the song goes on and on and one by one, they all got sick of it.

Except Jeff and Britta, who had sung the song to its near completion and you can only imagine how long that takes.

"_Five_ _bottles of beer on the wall, five bottles of beer_," Jeff says animatedly. Any song about liquor has his vote. "_Take one down, pass it around, four bottles of beer on the wall._"

"_Four bottles of beer on the wall, four bottles of beer_," Britta takes over, just as excitedly. "_Take one down, pass it around, three bottles of beer on the wall._"

"_Three bottles of beer on the wall, three bottles of beer…_"

"… _take one down, pass it around…_"

"… _No more bottles of beer on the wall_…"

Shirley and Annie sigh in relief, but Jeff and Britta are hardly done. "_No more bottles of beer on the wall. No more bottles of beer. Go to the store and buy some more. Ninety-nine bottles of beer on the wall_-"

"No, we are not- We are done with this song, thank you!" Annie shrieks and wakes Pierce, who begins shouting.

"What? We're still in this car?" He frowns. "I had a dream I was drinking a beer with Walt Disney. For some reason, the beers kept on coming…"

Jeff and Britta snicker and Shirley suggests, "Why don't we play the license plate game? Let's see who can find the license plate from the farthest state!"

At first, they all seem to be from Kansas, especially when they drive through Topeka and subsequently as they're headed towards Kansas City. But then, they see plates from New York, from Georgia, from Montana, and finally, it's Abed with the win- he spots a car with a license plate from Ontario, Canada. They stop for a barbecue dinner in Kansas City, just as they're toeing the border, but it's nearing six o'clock and they're all getting peckish. Pierce makes a mess of himself and they have to ask their waitress for extra wet napkins and Britta, of course, doesn't eat anything. When they're on the road again, Annie drives through the border and past the "Welcome to Missouri" sign.

"Toto, I have a feeling we're not in Kansas anymore," Abed says in a high-pitched voice and then turns to face Jeff, apologizing. "That was the last one, I promise."

But Jeff only chuckles. "No, the moment needed that."

It's getting dark as Annie drives down the turnpike, but they can tell that Missouri, unlike flat, tornado-ridden Kansas, is greener, with more foliage even if they do have just as many tornadoes. The night sky is a crisp violet, with glittering, twinkling stars, and they're all just starting to realize just how tired they are. Troy glances around uneasily, though, and when Annie asks why, he says, "I don't trust Missouri. They still hang the Confederate flag here."

"What?" Jeff questions. "Missouri wasn't even part of the Civil War."

"Well they still lynch black people here, I know that," Troy states matter-of-factly. "Watch how they treat Shirley and me when we check into our hotel later. You'll see."

"Troy, that's the most racist thing I've ever heard," Britta scolds. "This isn't the sixties; I'm pretty sure people are over the race thing."

"Yeah, we'll see," Troy says, not at all convinced.

And, when Annie pulls into the parking lot of their St. Louis hotel, Troy is proven to be both right and wrong. The bellboys at the hotel take in their information, sneering, and hand out their room keys with looks of sheer and utter disgust. It's not Troy and Shirley they particularly don't like; it's _all_ of them. For some reason, their exhausted-but-eager personalities scream out-of-state and they must give the appearance of haggard tourists, because the bellboys don't even try to bring in their bags for them. So, to be fair, they don't tip them. Instead, they break their group in threes- Troy and Abed in one room, the girls in another, and Jeff and Pierce, much to the former's chagrin, in the last.

The rooms are tiny and absolutely horrendous; the carpets are sticky and smell somewhat like cat urine ("Oh, Britta should feel right at home," Jeff comments to Pierce, who doesn't understand), the walls are painted a nauseating green, and the furniture looks as though it had been through the last bad tornado. The couch in Abed and Troy's room has a giant purple stain on it, the shower in Jeff and Pierce's room runs cold and smells of sulfur, and the sheets on the girls' beds are cold and a bit damp, as if the maids hadn't let them run their full cycle in the washing machine and dryer. But despite all of these setbacks, they've made it to St. Louis in one piece.

And you know what? Tomorrow's another day.


	2. And Through the Woods

**Thank you so much for the fantastic response! I want to address two things very quickly- to the two people who informed me Disneyland came before Disney World: my bad haha. I really should've done some research before I claimed the opposite. Thank you for correcting me and I'm super sorry for the confusion. And to the the anon who told me I should warn readers ahead of time if this story's going to end up with certain pairings, consider this your warning. ;)  
**

**What did you expect? Have you seen the other stories I've written? Hahaha thanks for reading and I hope you enjoy this chapter!**

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Early Modern Fantasy

Chapter Two: And Through the Woods

The longest leg of their trip was the beginning and they'd already completed that. Day two, the group planned to drive from St. Louis, Missouri to Atlanta, Georgia and set up camp for the night and this trip took only a mere eight hours, as opposed to the previous day's fourteen. Because it didn't take as long, they agreed the night before to sleep as late as they wanted and meet in the hotel lobby for breakfast and check-out procedures the next morning. Shirley, who is driving first, told everyone to be in the van no later than ten a.m. But, at nine thirty, they are filling up the gas tank and on the road, with everyone fully rested and well fed.

Shirley is a natural behind the wheel and everyone feels incredibly safe and comfortable as they cross the Missouri border and pass the "Welcome to Illinois!" state sign. Everyone's pretty quiet this morning as they watch the bright greens and rich browns of the Illinois foliage fly by before their eyes. They're subdued this morning and don't really feel like playing the car games they played the day before. There aren't any sing alongs, this time, or rounds of Mad Libs, and even the license plate game gets tiresome, after a bit. Shirley tries to get everyone involved in a rousing game of I Spy, but only Abed plays along.

When they enter Kentucky, Annie pipes up from the backseat, where she's seated with Abed and Troy. "Can I make a request?"

"Sure," Shirley answers, desperate for conversation. "Anything."

"Can we maybe stay at a nicer hotel tonight?" She pleads, like a child begging for dessert before dinner, and everyone agrees to her request. "I think the cheap soap gave me hives."

"I asked if you wanted to borrow mine," Britta scolds. "I bring my own shampoo and body wash for that reason. You learn these things when you travel often."

"Pierce and I had bed bugs," Jeff states and scratches his arm out of habit. "So needless to say, I slept on the couch."

"I _wish_ we could've used our couch," Troy says. "You should have _seen_ the stain. It looked radioactive or something. Like a biohazard."

"And how about that cold shower, Jeffrey?" Pierce, who is sitting in the passenger's seat, says to his previous night's roommate. "Awful. Not only was it as cold as ice, but it smelled like someone's science experiment."

"Yeah, it was pretty bad," Jeff nods. "We can definitely look for a better place tonight. A Marriot would be nice. It's pricier, but you get what you pay for."

"We should probably switch up the roommates too," Britta suggests, receiving a grateful look from Jeff, who had spent the entire morning bitching to her about how awful Pierce had been that evening. "Just… I don't know. So we don't get too clique-y, you know?"

"Britta, I really don't think we're going to become 'clique-y' within our own clique," Annie rolls her eyes. "And are you suggesting we intermix genders? That's not a good idea, is it?"

"Well, you live with Troy and Abed at home," Britta points out and Annie bites her lip.

"That's true," Shirley states. "So you three can room together, I'll room with Jeff, and Britta can room with Pierce."

"Why do I have to room with Pierce?" Britta blurts out and the latter scoffs.

"Hey!" Pierce is offended. "Did you ever think maybe I didn't want to room with you either?"

"I'm sorry, Pierce! That's not- I didn't mean it like that," She backpedals quickly. "It's not you're a bad person to room with, it's just that… You and I don't have anything in common. Don't you think you'd be more comfortable rooming with someone like Troy? Since you've already lived together and such."

"Well, that does make sense," Pierce considers and Troy shrugs.

"Yeah, I'm fine with that."

"Okay then!" Shirley arranges, eyes never leaving the road. "So I'll room with Jeff, Troy will room with Pierce-"

"I'm going to stick with Annie," Abed says and the brunette looks gleeful at this prospect.

Annie's eyes are bright as she squeals, "Okay!"

"Great," Britta frowns. "And then I'm the outlier that no one wants."

"You can room with us," Jeff offers and Britta thanks him, but Shirley immediately protests.

"Uh uh, no way," Shirley shakes her head, switching lanes of traffic. "I'm not rooming with you two horny toads. I'm not getting in the middle of that. Not happening."

"You can room with us," Annie suggests, Abed nodding along.

Shirley looks as though she's considering which 'couple' is the lesser of two evils. Finally she grins at Annie and Abed. "Okay, it's settled then. You, me, and Abed, Jeff and Britta, and Troy and Pierce. And preferably in a much nicer hotel this time. It shouldn't be too hard to find, right?"

They nod their agreement and continue down the thruway. When Kentucky begins to fade away, so does the cool weather. Suddenly, the temperature rises from a mild seventy-two degrees to a sweltering ninety. Shirley immediately switches on the air conditioning and has it circulating throughout the van for a good fifteen minutes, just until it's cool enough to be bearable, until there's a loud clicking sound and the entire coolant system shuts down. Soon, the entire car is bathing in sweltering heat, the broken air conditioning the first thing on everyone's mind.

"Well this is just great," Britta groans as they pass the "Welcome to Tennessee!" state sign. "It's only going to get hotter from here on out and we don't have a way of cooling down."

"Of course we do," Pierce disagrees, rolling down the passenger side window. "You guys are so used to having everything handed to you, you don't know how to make or do anything for yourself anymore!"

Britta shouts back an indignant response, but her reply is drowned out by the rushing wind of the thruway when everyone else follows Pierce's advice and rolls down their windows. But the incoming air is just as hot and humid as the air inside the van and soon everyone is not only hot, sticky, and irritable, but wind-blown and just a bit hearing impaired from the high sound. If they thought Pierce was awful when he was bored, forget about Pierce when he's bored, hot, and slightly deaf. He complains for fifteen straight minutes, in a high decibel, about being cranky, and Shirley pulls off the thruway the second she spots a rest stop with a McDonalds.

"It's not high quality eating, but it'll be air conditioned in there," She says. "Plus we can fill up the tank, switch drivers, and I'm sure there's some kind of gift shop that has to have portable fans."

They agree with her logic and the first thing they do when they park the oppressively hot van is go inside, to the restrooms, to freshen up. When they're looking presentable, they order meals from McDonalds (Troy and Abed get Happy Meals and Annie and Britta question their sanity). Shirley's right; it's _not_ quality eating. But it is delicious and hey, this is America, land of the greasy and fatty. Might as well play along. But the two that gripe the most about this are, of course, Jeff and Britta, who both order a salad- Britta, because she's a vegetarian, and Jeff, because he's super insecure about his image. Shirley, Annie, and Pierce eat their hamburgers and world-famous French fries and stare at the two as if they were from another planet.

Following their unhealthy but satisfying lunch, they wander over to the gift shop as Pierce goes out to fill the car with gas, seeing as he's the one driving the next portion of the trip. The gift shop is possibly the largest one at a rest stop they had seen thus far and offers everything from apparel to food and from gag gifts to meaningful trinkets. Shirley picks up a bright green t-shirt that reads, "I Took the Last Train to Clarksville!" and says, "I didn't know that the Clarksville in that song meant Clarksville, Tennessee! This is too cute!"

"Shirley, that song is _awful_," Troy tells her, placing a foam hat with a bird's beak on top on his head. "Now this. _This_ is useful in our everyday lives."

"Forget fans," Britta states, picking up a squirt gun from the rack before her. "Can we just get a bunch of these?"

"Oh it is _on_," Jeff agrees, choosing a red one to complement Britta's green. "For your information, I'm kind of awesome at water gun fights."

"That's too bad," Britta shakes her head. "Because I _dominate_ at them."

"Oh yeah?" He asks, skeptic. "You'll never find me. I have the greatest hiding spots. That's how I win them all."

"And where are you going to hide," Britta implores daringly. "Trapped in an eight-seat van?"

"I will find a way," He says confidently. "And then I will beat you."

"Not if I beat you first!"

"Guys," Annie rolls her eyes. "Stop. Buying squirt guns is useless anyway. We don't have a way to refill them."

"Oh, yeah, that's true."

"I found fans," Abed calls from the other side of the store and the group heads in his general direction. "They're not exactly what I was expecting."

They are tiny, battery-operated handheld fans, but they're all they've got, so the group buys seven. And at last, with Pierce in the driver's seat, Jeff in the passenger side, Britta and Abed in the middle and Troy, Annie, and Shirley in the back, they're on the road again, this time towards Nashville. It's a little after two o'clock and they're making great time today, despite the minor setbacks of starting later than yesterday and having to stop to buy a new way of keeping themselves cool. They get fifty feet down the turnpike before they realize that they may have bought fans, but they forgot to buy batteries.

Another stop later, everyone is still a sweaty, ill-tempered mess, but they've got cool air blowing on their faces and that's all they can really do right now. They're twenty minutes outside of Nashville, the birthplace of all things country, when they all come to an agreement that Pierce's driving is putting them behind schedule. He goes too slow and when they tell him to pick up the pace, he speeds down the thruway. They get pulled over when they finally do reach Nashville, but Pierce somehow manages to talk his way out of the ticket. He drives like a blind grandpa after that and Jeff, annoyed beyond belief, forces him to pull over so they can switch.

"You're not talking your way out of this," Jeff grunts and slides into the driver's seat, clicking his seatbelt and propping his fan in between the steering wheel and the dashboard. "Now sit down and shut up."

"My driving may not be up to your standards, Jeffrey, but I think I've had my license a little longer than you have," Pierce tells him.

"Yeah, you might want to think about giving that up." Jeff tells him and then they're back on the turnpike once more.

They're _hot_; these fans are in no way keeping them cool, they're just taking the edge off of the heat. No one talks to each other because even that would be too much effort, too much hot air expelled into the already stuffy van. Troy is leaning against the glass window of the backseat, eyes glazed over and watching the lines of the pavement run beneath him. Next to him is Annie, who is most likely the most uncomfortable, seated in the middle of two sticky people. She's resting her head against the back of the seat and when she blinks her vision comes back blurry. The fan that's focused so close to her face is drying her eyes out… But she doesn't care.

Shirley's cheek is resting against the semi-cool wall of the car beside her, the fan blowing into her neck and up through her hair. It's the hottest part of her and where she needs it most, but she's hoping hers is the shower that only runs cold, tonight. In the middle row of seating, Abed is stone-faced as he watches other cars pass them by, with other occupants that are happier and cooler than he is right now. Britta, sitting beside him, appears completely taken over by the heat. Her hair is lying in thick, sweaty tendrils on her forehead and her fan is doing nothing to keep her cool.

Pierce is half-awake, chin in his hands, in the passenger seat and the only one who seems to be even remotely alive is Jeff, but that's because he's the one driving. He's determined to make it to Atlanta and, from Nashville, it's only a matter of mere hours, four, maybe five at most. Jeff's relieved to have a break from the constant chatter they've had since they left yesterday, but he also can't drive in silence, a habit he picked up from Britta, just as she'd picked up his love of the smirk. So he reaches over and turns on the radio, unfamiliar with the channels in Tennessee, and fumbling with the dial clumsily as he keeps one hand, always, on the steering wheel. The radio takes quite a lot of force to work and Jeff has to push the different preset buttons quite hard to get any results.

"News, news, news in Spanish, ugh, kids channel," Jeff says mindlessly and then smacks the radio forcefully. "Come on, you piece of shit!"

There's an awful, garbled sound and then the radio switches to a station that, from the sounds of it, only plays Old Italian operas. Jeff groans and pushes the button again. "_Not_ what I wanted."

Except, when he pushes the button again, nothing happens. He tries every number on the dashboard and the radio won't change stations. Great. The damn thing is stuck on this awful opera channel. Everyone whines their protests to his awful choice in music, so he turns the dial towards the off position. Again, nothing happens. They all watch, horror struck, as Jeff turns the dial again and again and the Old Italian opera continues to drone throughout the van's speakers. Fan-freaking-tastic. Now they have to listen to this for the rest of the trip.

"You couldn't just let us have a little peace and quiet," Shirley deadpans as an alto shrieks in her ear.

"Well it's Britta's fault," Jeff groans as they begin to pass through Chattanooga.

Britta's immediately outraged, though not quite as mad as she could be, because she's _so_ hot. "Of course it is. I'm not the one driving, I didn't turn on the radio, I didn't make it get stuck, but sure! Let's blame it on Britta! Blame _everything_ on me!"

"Well my inability to drive without the radio on stemmed from _your_ inability to drive without the radio on, so _yeah_," He glares at her through the rearview mirror. "It's your fault!"

Britta, too sweaty and irritated to argue back, sticks her tongue out at him and settles against the window once more. Annie groans, "Ugh! I'm already annoyed at this freaking car for the air conditioning problem and now this too! You're lucky I'm too excited about Disney World and too hot to move right now, because you don't _want_ to see a Crazy Annie tantrum!"

Jeff sighs, knowing this is his entire fault (no matter how much he blames it on Britta), and says nothing. They pass the "Welcome to Georgia!" sign just after four o'clock in the afternoon and after two solid hours of opera singing. It's then that Troy awakens from the trance he's in. He listens deeply to the Italian gibberish coming out of the radio, and says, "Wait… If you listen closely… It sounds like the woman is really, really angry at the guy. She's all, 'How could you do that to me? You've betrayed me greatly. I can never love you again. You've lost me forever'."

Annie and Shirley just stare at him blankly. The rest of the group has no reaction. But Abed, picking up on his best friend's logic, nods and says, "And the guy is saying, 'Oh please, woman. You've betrayed yourself by loving me. You knew what kind of man I was when you married me. I'm sleeping with your sister'."

Shirley gasps but Annie giggles and Troy, as the woman, continues. "'My sister! My sister! How could you, with my sister? I wanted marriage, I wanted a family. I never knew you never wanted me!'"

"'You're just a pretty face, you know. Your sister is much prettier'," Abed-as-the-tenor says. "'We're leaving for Verona tomorrow… On my spaceship!'"

And then things proceeded to get weird. Not only were there spaceships and aliens, but full-fledged galaxy wars complete with air missiles, lasers, robots, and all kinds of ridiculous nonsense that only Troy and Abed could come up with. It's ridiculous, but it's entertaining, and it keeps everyone in good spirits as they drive through Georgia, the peach state. An hour later, when Troy and Abed tell a tale of an orphaned robot who finally found love in his adoptive, chimpanzee parents (as if an opera would _ever _be about this), they profess their hunger and Jeff pulls off the thruway about twenty minutes outside of Atlanta.

They find this cute little Mexican restaurant called South of the Border and decide to eat there. Britta and Troy haven't eaten Mexican food since the awful service and food they got at that place back home and Abed's never liked it, so the three of them head across the street to a sandwich shop and eat there. Annie and Shirley tell their waiter it's Jeff's birthday and he gets not only a gigantic margarita, which he doesn't drink because he's the driver, but he also gets a giant bowl of fried ice cream and must wear a sombrero, restaurant policy. He looks ridiculous, but he grins and bears it through endless rounds of tacos and enchiladas.

When everyone's eaten, they pile back into the sweaty car and finish off their journey to Atlanta. They find a Springhill Suites, a Marriot to Jeff's liking, and check in, but just as they're bringing their bags into the lobby, the four Mexican-eaters are seized with awful stomach cramping and chronic diarrhea. Eyes as wide as saucers, Britta, Troy, and Abed have never been happier to not have had Mexican food in their lives. Troy makes Pierce as comfortable as he can on their shared couch and brings him water bottles from the vending machine practically all night. Abed, with both Annie and Shirley in his room, takes in all of the symptoms and makes sure this is food poisoning and not dehydration from their day of roasting in the van. And Britta spends most of the night arguing with Jeff about caring for him, forcing him to drink water and bringing him ice from the machine down the hall.

But their hotel is only a few feet away from a mechanic, so Troy drops the van off and tells them to fix the air conditioning and, if they can, the radio. They'll be able to pick it up the next morning and, satisfied with that answer, he heads back to the hotel to care for his food-poisoned friends. He meets Britta at the ice machine, who rolls her eyes when he asks how Jeff's doing, which tells him they're bantering more than helping each other. On the way back to his room, he stops at the vending machine to get Pierce another water bottle and runs into Abed. They share their handshake and he asks how Annie and Shirley are doing.

"It's not pretty in there," Abed shakes his head. "We've got a real _Bridesmaids_ situation going on."


	3. The Happiest Place on Earth

**Hello again! Thank you so much for the response! The reviews are greatly appreciated, believe me. On to chapter three! I don't own anything, obviously, and please feel free to correct me if I got something wrong with the car info. I did research this time, but I'm only basing it off of what I found on the internet. I'm no auto-mechanic. ;)**

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Early Modern Fantasy

Chapter Three: The Happiest Place on Earth

Rain is dribbling quietly on the rooftop and windowpanes of the Atlanta, Georgia Springhill Suites and the hotel room, Jeff notes when he opens his eyes, is just as dark now as it was when he went to sleep hours ago. The glowing crimson digital clock beside his bedside informs him that it's quarter to eight and when he takes in his surroundings- dark hotel room, pounding headache- he wonders if he's regressed to his past self, bedding a random stranger in a town no one cares to remember. But then he remembers the previous two days and the awful night and sighs heavily. Letting a yawn escape his lips, Jeff rolls over to meet the cooler side of the pillow and instead meets a welcoming grin from Britta, who's already showered and fully dressed, sipping coffee from the other full bed inside their shared room.

"Morning," She says cheerfully, very un-Britta-like, and motions towards the bedside table on her side. "I got you some coffee. Feel any better today?"

"Yeah, just fantastic," He answers, sitting up and reaching gratefully for the coffee. "And you're obviously feeling like everything's sunshine and rainbows."

"Well I woke up a little after six and I couldn't fall back asleep," Britta shrugs, folding her legs beneath her Indian-style. "So I got dressed, went for a little walk around the hotel, and then I met up with Troy and Abed for breakfast. Good news: Troy said he dropped the van off at a mechanic down the road and that it'll be ready in a few hours. It'll be good to have air conditioning again, considering I just checked the forecast for Orlando and it's supposed to be ninety-seven degrees today."

"Good. Did you tell him to fix the radio too?" Jeff asks hopefully, downing the coffee and getting out of bed to find his suitcase of clothing.

"No, but I'm sure Troy remembered," Britta says. "Anyway, Abed's driving this morning and says we all have to meet him in the lobby by nine. But seriously, you feel okay and everything? Because you're going to be trapped in a car all day and I don't want you to feel sick."

"Yes, I'm fine Britta, thank you," He rolls his eyes, choosing an outfit for the day and heading towards the bathroom. "The only thing I'm feeling is the strong urge to stay away from Mexican food for a while."

Britta chuckles. "That's wise."

Once they're both together and packed, Jeff and Britta clear their belongings from the room and head to the lobby to checkout, where they meet up with Abed, Annie, and Shirley, the latter two looking just as turned off by the prospect of Mexican food as Jeff had. Exactly at nine o'clock, Pierce comes strolling into the lobby looking completely disheveled and knocking over suitcases when he bumps into furniture. His excuse is that he's still not feeling up to par and the rest of the study group shares a wary glance before telling him he can sit in the backseat today. Troy returns to the parking lot with the car a few minutes later and, with Abed behind the wheel and Britta as his copilot, they're off towards Disney World.

The moment they're on the road again, comfortably with air conditioning this time, they realize the mechanic may have fixed their coolant system but he did nothing to attempt to fix the radio, which is still droning out that Old Italian opera, much to everyone's chagrin. Pierce complains that the falsetto is making him nauseous and Jeff and Shirley, who are seated on either side of him, both lean instinctively towards their windows. To cover up Pierce's carsickness, or really whatever was left from his food poisoning, Abed and Troy launch into more of their game of "let's pretend we know what the opera singers are saying" and continue to create absurd storylines with outlandish characters.

Three hours later, around noon, they reach Albany, Georgia and decide to stop for lunch. When Abed asks where, Jeff, Annie, Shirley, and Pierce, in unison, shout, "_Not_ Mexican!" Instead, they stop at a gas station to fill up the tank and stock up on snacks for later and then drive a few more feet down the highway to find a burger joint that advertised "the best burgers in town." They're decent enough, but they don't spend enough time in Albany to find out if they're necessarily the best. Since Abed had driven half of their journey already, he switches spots with Britta, who takes the wheel, and off they go once more.

Pierce falls asleep somewhere between driving through peach orchards and hitting the thruway once more, so the group is rewarded with silence in the backseat. Troy and Abed have long since grown tired of their opera game and have instead resorted to playing the one-word story game. Their story about a mutant frog-chicken hybrid is driving the rest of the group absolutely insane; Jeff and Shirley share one of their "I would _love_ to kill one of them, wouldn't you?" looks, Annie is slowly rocking back and forth in her seat, _this close_ to losing it, and Britta is gripping the steering wheel so tightly, her knuckles are turning white.

Finally, they pass the "Welcome to Florida!" state sign and Britta busies them all by distracting them by it. "Hey look! We've finally made it! Only three hours to Orlando… Or something like that."

But this doesn't make anyone feel any better; after three days of being confined in these close quarters, everyone's really starting to hit the wall. They're done with the whole car thing. The cutesy group road trip had been a great idea, in theory. But now that they've experienced it and the certain misfortunes that came along with it, they're hoping that the Disney World portion of the vacation is better, because this really isn't that much fun. Britta turns onto the Florida turnpike and glances at her friends in the rearview mirror; Annie gives her a small but weary smile, Shirley a small shake of the head, Troy a goofy grin, and Jeff his signature irritated look. Abed pats her arm which gives her the confidence to continue on, as if she had a choice.

However, they've barely been on the turnpike for twenty minutes before the van gives a shocking jolt and then it feels as though they're bumping down the road in the Flintstones car. There's an awful smell, like that of burning rubber, and Britta slows down and pulls over to the shoulder of the road, concerned that there is something seriously wrong with the car. Turning off the vehicle, everyone but Pierce hurries out of the van (if the van is on fire or in danger of exploding or something they'll go back for him) and crowds around the hood, which Jeff unlatches and when he does, is bathed in a thick cloud of white smoke.

"Oh great," Jeff coughs, sputtering and waving his arms in front of his face. "Well that's never good."

"No one can blame this on me," Britta warns but everyone's attention is still on the smoking engine.

"We're in the middle of a massive highway," Shirley says reproachfully. "We aren't anywhere near a mechanic!"

"This is how episodes of _I'm Alive_ always start," Abed frowns. "I'm watching."

"We can't even call for help!" Annie panics. "Everyone we know lives in Colorado!"

"Alright, alright," Troy starts, pushing back his sleeves. "Let me see it. It might not be an air conditioning vent, but I might be able to figure it out."

When most of the smoke finally clears, Jeff inspects the engine and says, "Looks like the HT leads deteriorated. It's right next to the AC system. The mechanic may have fixed the air conditioning last night, but he screwed up the high tension extensions."

But Troy gives the engine a once-over and shakes his head, disagreeing. "No, I'm pretty sure it's the spark plug. Why else would the engine be smoking like that?"

"Maybe because the deteriorated HT leads are rubbing together and causing friction?" Jeff says challengingly and Troy frowns.

"Or maybe it's because the spark plug misfired," Troy states adamantly, not backing down. "If we let the damage go, it could damage the catalytic converter. It only costs around ten bucks to fix, but a home remedy will have to work for now."

"Unless that's not the problem at all," Jeff argues. "Where did you get your auto mechanic degree, Troy?"

"The same place you _didn't_ get yours, Jeff," Troy shouts. "Now back up and let me fix the car!"

"You don't even know what the problem is!"

"Oh, and you do?"

"I have a bit more experience working with cars than you do, Troy."

"Yeah but believe me, air conditioning units and car engines are similar. Besides, the engine's _smoking_, so I _know_ it's the spark plug!"

"Wow, should I get a ruler?" Britta deadpans.

"Britta, ew!" Annie shrieks and colors slightly. "Guys, why are we even fighting about this? Let's just try and fix it. Jeff, do you know how to fix an HT… whatever?"

"Not without a proper tool kit," He shakes his head. "Some WD-40 would be a temporary solution, but I doubt anyone packed any of that."

"Okay," Annie nods, problem-solving. "Troy, do you know how to fix the spark plug?"

"You can't really fix it; you have to replace it," Troy informs them. "But I'll do what I can to make a temporary fix."

"Great," Annie grins. "Just something that'll get us to Orlando and then we can ditch this car for a new one for the ride home."

Troy nods, all business-like, and kneels before the car. "I'll see what I can do."

He finds some duct tape in the glove compartment and, after he's waited a moment for the engine to cool down, sticks his entire arm into the engine towards the spark plug. The first thing he feels is the warm, oily black grease coating his hand, running slick down his arm, and weaving itself between his fingers. It's _disgusting_ and there isn't a proper way for him to wash this off, he realizes, afterwards. But then he feels the loose, unhinged spark plug and smiles satisfactorily. He _had_ been right, so take that Jeff. He manages to screw it back into place and then wraps some grease-slick duct tape around it, twice and then three times, to secure it into place. It definitely isn't the way to fix a spark plug, but they've got no other option on the middle of the turnpike.

Troy turns around to face his friends, who are crowded around him in the beating sunlight and scorching heat, and grins to signify that he's got it. They all thank and congratulate him for recognizing the problem and supplying the quick fix, but Jeff is still brooding. "Just because you're right doesn't mean I'm wrong. We should still check the HT leads."

"Even if that is the problem, we can't fix that with duct tape," Troy shakes his head. "That will _definitely_ catch fire."

"Fine," Jeff gives in, heading back inside the car. "So glad you're here to fix our every breakdown."

"He's just throwing a tantrum," Britta waves it off, handing Troy her water bottle. "Thanks for fixing the car. You did a great job."

"Thanks," He grins back at her and takes a sip of the water before dumping the rest on his greasy arm.

They're back on the turnpike a little after two p.m. and the moment Britta turns on the engine, it runs as smoothly as a dream. They would be much more careful this time in choosing a mechanic, once they got to Orlando; the last had been paid way too much and though he managed to fix their coolant system, he also managed to dislodge the spark plug and cause the car to break down. But the rest of their journey is smooth sailing; they're driving down the turnpike, passing by lakes and orange groves, and truly taking in everything that is the wonderful state of Florida.

Before they know it, Britta turns onto the ramp for Orlando and the vivid green road sign tells them that Walt Disney World is only twenty-eight miles away. Mickey ears are on nearly everything and soon, all of the signs are in purple and yellow instead of green and white. It's almost five thirty when they finally reach Lake Buena Vista Drive, and Annie, all childlike, squeals excitedly when they drive past Downtown Disney, the strip of nightclubs, restaurants, and shops for everyone's desire. A few more miles and then Britta pulls into the resort that would be their home for the next several days- Disney's Old Key West Resort.

The enchanting resort lives up to its name by incorporating all of the charming tranquility that is the Florida Keys. All of the buildings are covered in cool pastel blues, corals, and greens, with lattice-like white accents upon the Victorian architecture. The resort reminds the group almost of being in a storybook, with all the suites being covered in ornate gingerbread-type accents and lavish porches with wicker furniture. Sandwiched comfortably between glittering waterways that reflect the setting evening sun and swaying palm trees on lush green land, the Old Key West Resort is, in a word, paradise.

"Wow," Jeff admires as they all exit the vehicle to stretch their legs and take in their temporary home. "We're definitely not slumming it, are we?"

"This is absolutely beautiful!" Shirley exclaims joyfully. "It's completely perfect."

"It should be," Pierce, grumpy from being awakened abruptly from his nap, grumbles. "For the hefty price we're paying for it."

"Yeah, but you get what you pay for," Britta states in shock. "This place is nicer than my apartment!"

"_Greendale_ is nicer than your apartment," Jeff shoots back and Britta glares at him.

"Let's go check in!" Annie suggests as they open the back of the van to take out their luggage. "If it's this nice on the outside, imagine what it looks like inside!"

"Annie, how much did you _pack_?" Troy complains, yanking out at least three suitcases of the same pink polka dot pattern. "And is one of these suitcases the one with the rest of our shirts? Because if you forgot them, _so help me God_, Annie-"

"Relax," She rolls her eyes, pointing towards the middle-sized one. "They're in there. And you won't make fun of me when I'm the only one prepared with water, sunscreen, and bug spray tomorrow."

They all chuckle, gather their own luggage, and travel up the sandy sidewalk towards the main lobby. The white French doors give way to the hardwood-floored, cream-colored lobby that's covered, wall to floor, in windows. There's modest lighting, oriental rugs, and cozy-looking green couches, all surrounding expensive-looking coffee and end tables. There are various plants stationed around the room and fancy, ornate grandfather clocks in a few different corners. The study group approaches the cherry oak check in counter and comes face to face with an overly cheerful redhead.

"Good evening and welcome to Disney's Old Key West Resort!" She greets them. "Are you checking in as a group?"

"No, individually," Annie answers and she must look as exhausted as she sounds, because this redhead chuckles at her expression.

"Long day of hitting the parks, huh?" She asks and it's Annie's turn to laugh.

"No, we haven't even gone to the parks yet," Annie tells her. "We drove here from Colorado."

Abed nods for confirmation. "We just spent the last three days in the car."

"Are you serious?" The redhead asks, dropping her saccharine Disney voice and when the group nods, asks, "Are you _crazy?_"

They're wondering the same thing, but they check into their rooms anyway. This time, everyone gets their own room, because after three days of being stuck together in the car and a week ahead of spending twenty-four hours a day together, they need the solace and comfort of their own rooms to bring themselves back to sanity. Once everyone's been checked into their rooms, they head up to see what they're lodgings will be like and absolutely expecting the best, after seeing both the exterior and the lobby of the resort.

And, once again, they're hardly let down.

The room themes are coral, pink with seashells and blue-green with the sea water that Florida is famous for. Beds comfy and couches cozy, each room has a flat-screen television, a breakfast nook, and a full walk in closet. The bathrooms are almost the same size as the bedroom, with a Jacuzzi tub, full shower, and porcelain toilet adjacent to the fountain sink. After a solid fifteen minutes of marveling and a little unpacking, the group meets one last time for the evening for dinner in the cozy restaurant in the resort.

They're so hungry no one talks until they've finished their meals. Then Annie says, "So we should probably make preliminary plans for tomorrow."

"Ugh Annie," Troy shakes his head. "We're on vacation. Don't use words like 'preliminary'."

"Yeah, plus I don't like planning," Britta agrees. "Let's just go with the flow. We bought a seven-day park-hopper pass. We can do whatever we want _whenever_ we want."

"Thanks for explaining that concept," Jeff smirks. "But Britta's uncharacteristically right. We should just figure out what we want to do in the moment."

"Well can I at least get an _idea_ of what you guys want to do tomorrow?" Annie asks and they all groan. "I'm sorry! I don't improvise anything! I plan ahead and prepare because that's what gets the job done."

"But Annie, you're on vacation," Shirley shakes her head. "There's no 'job'. But I guess, if it makes you feel better, I would prefer not to do a water park tomorrow. I just don't want to start off with that."

"I was going to say we should start with a water park," Pierce counteracts. "After three days in the car it'll be nice to just sit by the pool."

"I think tomorrow morning we should check and see which park has the extra magic hours," Abed proposes. "And then we should go to that one."

"And this is why we don't plan ahead," Jeff says to Britta, who nods her agreement. "I'm going to take a walk. Want to join me?"

"Gladly," She responds and the two slip away from the table, completely unnoticed by the still-arguing study group.

The sky is a thrilling purple, now, and is slowly descending into a solid black as the dazzling stars continue to make themselves known all over the horizon. Their path is sand swept and smells of the ocean, even though they're far from it, lit by tiki torches and glittering but flickering lights. Jeff and Britta are silent for most of the walk, taking in the fireflies and careening crickets as well as the brilliant night air as they amble down the beaten path. They reach a small bridge that leads to the other side of the resort and runs over the trickling water below them. Jeff pauses on the bridge, so Britta does too, and heaves a long sigh.

"I don't know if I'm going to be able to take a whole week of this study group," Jeff confesses and Britta honestly isn't shocked. "Sometimes we're just too many strong personalities in one room."

"Yeah, I can understand that," Britta nods, leaning against the bridge and gazing out over the moonlit water. "But I think it'll be fun and… I think it'll be good for us."

"Really? My therapist told me I'm not 'emotionally ready' for group situations," Jeff shrugs. "She says I need 'me-time.' I don't know. She kind of sucks."

"Jeff, you do not need any alone time, especially now," Britta disagrees. "When you're left alone, that's when you self-doubt and self-deprecate the most. And since you already have enough issues in those departments, I _highly_ doubt you need any more."

"Thank you for that vote of confidence," He states and at her alarmed look, adds, "I'm _joking_. I guess you're right, which means there must be something wrong with this situation."

Britta nudges his arm, smiling as she moves out of the way for an older couple to pass with their young grandkids. "Shut up."

Before Jeff can respond, the older woman turns back to say, "You two make such a _lovely_ couple!"

Jeff and Britta stumble and stammer over their words trying to get denials out fast enough. "Oh God, _us?_ No, no, no, we're not, no way. We're not a couple, believe me. We tried the whole-ha ha! Yeah, no. Definitely not. Uh uh. Not going to happen. Nope!"

"Oh," The woman winks at them. "I understand. I'm hip to the times!"

"Grandma," The oldest child, a teenage boy, groans. "You're _so_ embarrassing!"

As the family continues on their way, Jeff and Britta share a look and begin their walk back to their rooms. Jeff says, "Oh God. That was embarrassing."

"I know," Britta agrees. "Can you imagine? Us as a _couple?_"

"No," Jeff laughs. "Holding doors for each other and going out to dinner and holding hands?"

Britta chuckles. "And kissing in the moonlight and taking romantic strolls and being all cutesy?"

"Ugh, don't make me _sick_," Jeff says, rolling his eyes. "I mean who would ever want that?"

"Psh, _not_ me," Britta states adamantly. "And anyway, we're at the happiest place on Earth with five of our best friends. We don't need to romantically entangle to be happy."

"No we do not," Jeff agrees, but then says, "Although we did have some pretty good times last year, you've got to admit."

"Yeah," Britta chuckles, glancing down. "Yeah, we did."

There's a moment of silence before they realize they've come to the hotel lobby once more. They enter the building, ride the elevator and then part ways. Jeff calls after her, "See you tomorrow, bright and early. I wonder if the group ever picked a park…"

"I guess we'll find out, won't we?" Britta implores. "Goodnight."

He smiles back. "Goodnight."

They'd finally made it to Florida, to Disney World, to the happiest place on Earth. They're both in new and exciting places in their own lives. So... Why do old tensions seem to be resurfacing?


	4. The Glitz and Glam of Hollywood

**Hello again friends! Thanks for reading and reviewing and I'm super glad you're enjoying this so far. I had a lot of fun writing this chapter and just this story in general. The italicized paragraph at the beginning is from the Disney website on Hollywood Studios. I didn't write it haha. So... yeah! Enjoy!**

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Early Modern Fantasy

Chapter Four: The Glitz and Glam of Hollywood

"_Are you ready for your close-up? You could get discovered at Disney's Hollywood Studios! Here, attractions are all about bringing movies to life- and revealing behind the scenes action! There's live entertainment to rival what you'll find in the real Tinsel town. Kids of all ages can meet favorite Disney characters and collect autographs. Adventure addicts will get a thrill on rides that are high-speed or highly spooky! That's a wrap, folks!_"

Monday June eighteenth is the first official day of their Walt Disney World vacation and since Hollywood Studios (or what was formerly known as MGM Studios) had the extra magic hours that day, meaning the park was open longer, the study group decides at breakfast to go there first. The t-shirt of the day is a bright yellow one, as in neon, highlighter yellow, with black Hollywood-style font spelling out Greendale Seven on the front and each individual's name on the back. They wait patiently, somewhat tiredly, in front of the hotel for the Hollywood Studios bus, and soon they're on their way.

Looming in the distance and increasing in size as they grow nearer to the park is the 122-foot-tall blue and gold sorcerer's hat that Mickey wore in _Fantasia_ and is now the infamous icon of the park. Hollywood Studios is a behind-the-scenes look at how movies are made, how stunts are performed, and just how much Disney magic is put into the films and television shows today. It is, in this case, Abed's heaven. He's literally shaking with excitement as the bus pulls up to the already crowded park and is eager to get through the gates and get his hands on everyone and everything involved in the making of these magical movies.

Once they're inside the park, they're walking casually around Echo Lake when Pierce, who's studying the park map, exclaims, "Look! They've got a rollercoaster based on Aerosmith!"

"Ooh, the Rock 'N Rollercoaster?" Annie squeals. "I heard it's one of the fastest rollercoasters around and they play songs by Aerosmith the entire time!"

"You know, I once sang onstage with Aerosmith," Pierce nods, grinning at the memory, but the group laughs. He scoffs, shocked. "I did!"

"Pierce, come on. How many celebrities did you actually know?" Troy chuckles. "We barely believed you when you said you had sex with Eartha Kitt."

"I did have sex with Eartha Kitt!" Pierce insists. "And it was only a couple days _after_ I sang onstage with Aerosmith!"

The group continues to laugh and shake their heads disbelievingly and Pierce, indignant, responds, "I can sing _just_ as well, if not better than, Aerosmith… And I'll prove it!"

"How?" Britta asks, incredulous.

"In there!" Pierce exclaims, pointing, on his right side, towards the American Idol Experience, a show in which guests of the park could get the chance to compete for the title of American Idol for the day. "Just you watch!"

He nearly runs over to the theater's entrance, where a young blonde woman is taking in names and calling for an open audition. Pierce gives his information, throws and angry look back at the study group, and heads in to see if he'll get a callback. They all stare after him before Jeff says, "Okay… So what should we do?"

Abed can barely contain his excitement. "If we don't go to the Indiana Jones Epic Stunt Spectacular, I may have to disown you all."

"Ooh, Indiana Jones!" Annie squeals. "Let's do that first!"

They enter the outdoor amphitheater and when Shirley leads the group into a modest row of seating in the middle, Abed, horrified, looks as if he wants to disown her and then he and Troy nearly sprint towards the front row. Jeff and Britta stay with Shirley in the middle, but Annie gleefully skips over and sits on the other side of Abed, the three of them buzzing excitedly about the show as the Indiana Jones theme plays continuously through the speakers. About ten minutes before the show is scheduled to begin, an enthusiastic man dressed in desert garb appears and then quiets the crowd.

"Good morning, adventurers!" The man shouts enthusiastically. "My name is Rick and I'm going to be your casting director this morning! I need three brave, young souls to volunteer to be a part of our show this morning! Who thinks they can defy the odds and help Indiana Jones navigate his way through these dangers?"

Rick doesn't even finish his question before both Abed and Troy's hands shoot into the air. He chuckles, chooses them and a woman a few rows behind them looking just as eager, and says, "We have our three volunteers! Please tell us your names and why you think you'd be a great stunt person!"

He hands the microphone to Troy first, who grins and replies, "I'm Troy Barnes and I'm from a little shit town in Colorado where nothing happens, which is why I think I'd be a great stunt man. I like adventure and I like explosions and I love Indiana Jones, which I've seen forty-five times with my best friend."

He pats Abed's shoulder and hands him the microphone. "I'm Abed. I want to be a stunt man in this show because moviemaking is pretty much my life. Also, I know that _Raiders of the Lost Ark_ received eleven Oscar nominations and won seven, including the awards for Best Sound and Best Visual Effects. So I'm obviously a huge fan."

The woman beside him mentions that she's only volunteering for this because she has a huge crush on Harrison Ford, to which Jeff responds, "She knows this isn't the _real_ Indiana Jones, right?"

Shirley shakes her head. "Let her believe."

The moment the casting director ushers them out of the arena, the burly chap playing Indiana Jones comes hurdling through the air on a zip line, over the audience and landing just before the temple ruins backdrop. It turns out to be a real nail-biter of a show, as Indiana Jones defeats the villains, defies gravity, and searches for the golden idol treasure, all while doing stunts completely incomprehensible to the audience's eyes. The woman Rick chose at the beginning becomes the damsel in distress Indiana Jones rescues from harm's way and Troy becomes a stunt man in the village scene a few moments later.

But Abed is offered his dream job- behind the camera- as Indiana Jones acts out the infamous boulder scene. He's traipsing through the darkened cave, Abed filming with other cast and crew members and one explaining how the particular stunts are performed, when suddenly giant spears jut out from the ground. The audience watches as he dodges them by mere inches and Shirley comments, "This was always my favorite part of the movie. The boulder thing and the spears. You can't fake action like that."

"Really? I never really liked Indiana Jones," Britta declines. "I'm not a huge fan of the whole spaghetti western thing."

"It's not a spaghetti western," Annie replies quickly and quietly as she skips up to join them from her front row seat. "It's Indiana Jones!"

Jeff smirks at the brunette. "Come to sit with the cool people?"

"No," Annie denies. "I just realized I looked like a loser sitting down there by myself."

They laugh, Indiana Jones almost gets flattened by a twelve-foot rolling boulder, and then the show ends with a fiery truck explosion. The four show-viewers wait outside of the amphitheater for Troy and Abed to emerge as the show empties out and when they catch up with the rest of the study group, Troy looks happier than he's even been and Abed says, "That was the coolest thing I have ever done in my life."

"I seriously don't think _anything_ can top this moment," Troy grins.

"Jeez, chill out. You two look like you're about to have an orgasm." Britta smirks.

Annie scrunches her nose. "Thanks for that lovely mental picture."

They keep walking and, at the same time Shirley shouts, "Muppet Vision in 3D!" Troy screams, "_Star Tours!_" What ensues is a fifteen-minute argument about whether they should waste time watching Muppets or galaxy wars in 3D until finally they realize they're wasting time just arguing about it. "I vote we go to Star Tours," Troy tells them. "Because Star Wars redefined the sci-fi genre and… I'm sure Abed has some statistics on that!"

Before he can provide any, Shirley shakes her head and states, "But the Muppets are so cute! I took the boys to see the movie that came out this winter and it really brought me back to my childhood!"

"Wait," Annie asks. "You can use the word 'statistics' but I can't say 'preliminary'?"

"Guys, this is ridiculous," Jeff sighs. "We can do both. We have all day and it's only ten thirty. Let's go to Star Tours first, because it's literally right here, and then we'll go to the Muppet thing. Just… relax."

They grumble their agreement and run off towards the entrance of the first ride. Britta calls, "Stop running! And wait there so we can all go together!"

Then she stops herself, glances at Jeff, and chuckles. "Could we sound any more like their parents if we tried?"

Jeff laughs, too, and starts after their 'kids'. "No, I highly doubt _that's_ possible."

But his blasé attitude concerning the parks and Disney in general stops the moment they enter Star Tours, the ride through the galaxy that was also in 3D, and the group sees a side of Jeff they'd never seen before- the fanboy side. Turns out, he used to be a _huge_ fan of Star Wars and doesn't stop talking with Troy and Abed about the series' complexity, high and low points, and their favorite characters. Britta is honestly so shocked by this admission that she cannot even think of snide remarks fast enough. By the time she does, the ride is over, and they're headed towards Shirley's pick: Muppet Vision in 3D.

The attraction starts with a ten-minute pre-show in which they are able interact with a few of the fan favorites- Rizzo, Gonzo, and Fozzie Bear. And, following this, they enter the air-conditioned theater and watch the whimsical 3D show, where all the Muppets come to life. Annie and Shirley seem to enjoy the show, but the other four really aren't impressed. When they leave, they consult the park map and Annie suggests they head to the Studio Backlot Tour, but Troy and Abed see the Honey, I Shrunk the Kids Movie Set and immediately make a beeline for it. Surprisingly, once they arrive, Pierce is awaiting them.

"Pierce!" Troy exclaims as if he's their long-lost family member. "Where did you come from? How did you find us?"

"Are you kidding?" He asks incredulously. "You can spot those neon shirts from a mile away!"

"Also, I've been texting him every time we switch attractions," Annie informs the group and this makes much more sense. Pierce's vision isn't very good. "So how did the audition go?"

"Excellent! I got a callback!" Pierce says in an I-told-you-so voice. "The show's at two o'clock which is when you'll vote for the winner."

"Wow, congratulations!" Annie squeals, giving him a hug. "That's so great!"

"Yeah, I hope you win," Shirley smiles politely.

"Well, there is some stiff competition," Pierce sighs. "But Aerosmith's never failed me before."

"Uh huh," Jeff says slowly. "Well we'll try to make the show."

"Don't mind Jeff," Britta makes a gesture of unimportance. "We'll be there."

It takes them a total of fifteen minutes to walk through the entire Honey, I Shrunk the Kids Movie Set, mainly because it's built for children under the age of ten. For the most part, the group is entertained only for a few moments, but Troy and Abed, who have the _minds_ of children under the age of ten, absolutely love it. They're fascinated by the thirty-foot tall blades of grass, the giant can of Play Doh, the fifty-two-foot long leaking hose that sprays water at people as they pass, and the endless maze of jumbo plant roots.

It's nearing lunchtime when the group leaves their next attraction, Lights, Motors, Action! Extreme Stunt Show, in which they had watched a lively, active half hour of racing cars, fire, and explosions. To everyone's surprise, it seemed Britta had started to enjoy herself, watching the show animatedly and worrying about the stunt drivers being able to complete their stunts. Jeff got a kick out of watching her reactions and, quite frankly, paid more attention to her than he did to the show. When it's over, they revel in a quick lunch at the Toy Story-themed restaurant Pizza Planet, before bidding farewell to Pierce, who has to be at the theater for his performance.

They decide to hit one more ride before heading over to the American Idol Experience to cheer him on and the next on their list is the Studio Backlot Tour. This thirty-five minute tram ride showcases the most common special effects used in action movies and leaves Abed in his glory. He had been getting increasingly more excited as the day grew on and as they pile into the tram in pairs- Abed and Shirley, Annie and Britta, and Jeff and Troy- he's nearly giddy with excitement.

"Welcome, welcome!" Their tour guide greets them as the tram drives through the park and towards the area where a harbor attack is taking place.

They're allowed to press certain buttons which make things explode and the tour guide explains how these pyrotechnics are used to create battle scenes at sea. Abed's eyes widen and he says, "Cool. Cool, cool, cool."

Next they navigate their way through a warehouse in which Abed is quick to point out all of the props he recognizes from movies and television shows. "There's Princess Leia's gold bikini from _Return of the Jedi_. And there's the water truck from the film version of _Holes_. And there's the pirate ship from _Pirates of the Caribbean_!"

Finally, the tour ends when they drive through Catastrophe Canyon where an earthquake, a flash flood, explosions, and tons of crashes ravage the area through controlled tricks and special effects. Abed gasps and says, "Holy crap. Where has this ride been all my life?"

It's quarter to two when they exit the ride and head back towards the entrance of the park, where the American Idol Experience is located. The five of them take their seats, Annie and Shirley marveling at how much the theater actually does look like the American Idol set. A man who looks nothing like Ryan Seacrest takes the stage to welcome them to the show and Jeff squirms uneasily. Annie rolls her eyes, knowing of his disgust for the man, but Britta knows better and is pretty sure this stems from the bar mitzvah they attended earlier on in the year. She places a hand on his arm, imploring if he's alright, and he smiles at her. She smiles back and the show begins.

The first contestant, a woman who sings an awful rendition of "Somewhere Out There," is nearly booed off the stage. Troy looks outraged and turns to tell Abed how much better they sang that song… but Abed isn't sitting beside him. Before he can question his whereabouts, Pierce is announced and as he enters stage right, Annie and Shirley cheer for him from the audience. He blushes and tries to cover it up as the beginning chords to "I Don't Want to Miss a Thing" begin to play. Jeff and Britta brace themselves for the train wreck; the former expecting the worst, the latter hoping for the best but not entirely optimistic.

But a train wreck never comes. Pierce is actually _decent_. He sings, "_I could stay awake just to hear you breathing. Watch you smile while you are sleeping. While you're far away dreaming. I could spend my life in this sweet surrender. I could stay lost in this moment forever. Where every moment I spend with you is a moment I treasure!_"

Jeff's mouth agape, he says, "The chorus. He's got to screw up the chorus!"

But, again, he doesn't. "_Don't want to close my eyes. I don't want to fall asleep, 'cause I'd miss you babe, and I don't want to miss a thing. 'Cause even when I dream of you, the sweetest dream will never do. I'd still miss you babe and I don't want to miss a thing!_"

"Wow, he's _really_ good," Annie comments and Shirley nods her agreement.

"I know," Britta whispers back. "Who knew? Mr. Rad should've given him a bigger part in the Christmas pageant."

"_I don't want to miss one smile. I don't want to miss one kiss_," Pierce finishes. "_I just want to be with you, right here with you, just like this. I just want to hold you close. Feel your heart so close to mine. And just stay here in this moment for all the rest of time. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah!_"

He sings the chorus once more and then the song dies away. Jeff is so shocked he can't even applaud with the rest of the group. After a few more people showcase their talents, it's time to vote, and the final woman, the one who had sung a charming rendition of the late Whitney Houston's "I Will Always Love You," wins by a landslide. But Pierce comes in second and it's something the group tries to push more and more as they walk to their next ride, to lift his fallen spirits.

"Pierce, you were amazing!" Annie exclaims. "It doesn't matter that you came in second. You're the winner in my eyes!"

"Yeah, you definitely redefined our thoughts of your singing ability," Shirley nods. "We were apprehensive, but you proved us wrong."

"It was really courageous of you to get up there," Britta tells him honestly. "It's not something any of us would have ever done."

"I'm still not sure if you've ever sang that song with Aerosmith," Jeff says slowly. "But you did pretty well, considering the circumstances."

"Uh, guys?" Troy questions just as they've entered the line for the Great Movie Ride. "Where is Abed?"

And it's then that they realize Abed isn't with them and hadn't been present at Pierce's show. The last time they'd seen him was when they were exiting the tram on the Studio Backlot Tour, where they'd been immersed in a huge crowd, the only way they'd stayed together was through spotting their highlighter-yellow t-shirts. They're too far in line now to turn around and look for him, so Troy sends Abed a text and they board the ride that takes them through scenes from classic movies, such as _Raiders of the Lost Ark_, _Mary Poppins_, _Singin' in the Rain_, _Fantasia_, and many more. And then, when they're riding through _Alien_, they find Abed.

He's wedged in between two of the giant, animatronic aliens in the display and when the group sees this, they do a double take. Abed is literally _inside_ the ride and, as they continuously move through the scene, Troy and Jeff reach for him and successfully pull him into their buggy. He groans and says, "No, this is where I belong. If you send me my Halloween costume, I'll fit right in."

"You're insane," Jeff shakes his head. "How have you not been caught yet?"

"I'm pretty good at blending into the background." Abed responds solemnly.

"Okay," Annie says sympathetically. "But you can't stay here. How will you sleep… or eat?"

"I'd find a way," He sighs. "This place is pretty much perfect for someone like me."

"It's perfect for _a lot_ of people, Abed," Britta says carefully. "But it's perfect in a way where you come and visit and then… you have to leave."

"Nice," Jeff smirks, obviously making fun of her and she frowns at him.

"Yeah, I guess you're right," Abed smiles. "I guess that's kind of the gimmick."

Following Abed's mini-breakdown, they ride Toy Story Mania and sit through the Voyage of the Little Mermaid per Shirley and Annie's request. When they follow these by riding the Rock 'N Rollercoaster Starring Aerosmith, Pierce claims he's too old when they exit the ride and Shirley spends the entire thing praying to Jesus to let her make it through the ride. They stop for dinner afterwards, though no one's really hungry since they left their stomachs on the previous rollercoaster. At dinner, Shirley shrieks excitedly when she notes the final showing of Beauty and the Beast Live on Stage is at seven o'clock and, this being her favorite Disney movie, plans to attend. They all start to follow her, but Jeff seizes both Annie and Britta's arms and cocks his head towards the Tower of Terror.

They both protest but Jeff scoffs, indignant, and says, "Come on, you want to sit through Beauty and the Beast?"

"Excuse me, I _like_ Beauty and the Beast!" Annie says. "It's my favorite too."

"Actually, I'm with you." Britta agrees. "I'm not mentally prepared for princesses yet."

Jeff nods, grinning, and turns to Annie. "Are you coming or not?"

Annie glances around, as if trying to decide, and then follows the two towards the entrance. "Oh, okay."

They're led through the ill-fated Hollywood Tower Hotel as they glimpse all kinds of signs that something isn't quite right- the teacups are half empty, the cobwebs on the mailboxes cover letters and keys, and the broken grandfather clock in the lobby still chimes every hour on the hour, but it's a low, mournful tune. A bellhop with a deep, creepy voice leads them into the elevator all too quickly after they learn the fate of the five occupants who entered the Twilight Zone, locks them into their seats and asks at lightning speed, "Any questions, comments, concerns? No? Great, thank you. Please, enjoy your stay…"

And then, they're in pitch darkness. Annie asks, her voice wavering, "Guys, is this supposed to happen?"

"Of course," Britta answers as the elevator starts to move slowly upward, but she sounds nervous, too. "This is the Twilight Zone. They're not going to give us a spotlight, or anything."

The doors of the elevator suddenly open with a ding and the first thing they see is an eerie white light. There's a sound of thunder and pouring rain until suddenly, they see the ghostly figure of a little girl, no older than four or five, singing, "_Rain, rain, go away. Come again another day…_"

"That's awesome," Jeff chuckles. "They made it look so real."

Suddenly, the doors are slammed shut and the elevator is on the move upwards again, but only for a moment. They rise another twenty, thirty feet before they hover for just a moment, the windows opening to show them just how high in the air they really are. Britta peers out and says, "Oh wow that's… That's really high."

"Oh my God," Annie panics but doesn't have time to say anything else.

As if some invisible force just completely let go of the elevator, they're suddenly plummeting down, down into the depths of darkness as screams of terror fill the elevator shaft. This happens twice, three times, four times before they finally come to a stop and the doors shoot open, their bellhop intensely frightening, asking, "Did you enjoy your stay?"

Annie, face white, can only manage a small shake of the head. Britta's voice cracks when she says, "No!" Jeff is intensely amused.

When they exit the ride, it's already dark outside, the clock outside the ride reading eight forty-five. They meet up with the others, Jeff looking as though all his Christmases came at once and tells their friends he can't decide who screamed louder- Annie or Britta. The girls in question decide to give him the silent treatment for the rest of the evening and stride towards their final attraction for the night- Fantasmic, a fireworks and water show performed exclusively for the guests of the park. Annie and Britta sit beside each other and nowhere near Jeff, the others filling in the middle.

The show is spectacular, but yawns are emitted and eyes are rubbed, signifying sleep is imminent. It had been a magnificent first day of their vacation and provided for a brilliant outlook on the days to come.


	5. Enter the Oasis

**Hi guys! I'm back with the fifth chapter haha. It's so crazy- this story's half over already! :( It's so much fun to write, too. Anyway, on to their second day in Disney. The italicized portion at the beginning is from the video on the website about Typhoon Lagoon. Again, didn't write it and I do not own anything. Thanks for the reviews and for reading and enjoy chapter five!  
**

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Early Modern Fantasy

Chapter Five: Enter the Oasis

"_Once upon a time, a storm whipped through a tropical paradise and Disney's Typhoon Lagoon was created! Now Miss Tilly sits atop Mount Mayday where a fifty-foot geyser erupts every half hour! Get your thrills throughout the park- water coaster down the crazy Crush 'N Gusher, ride five story slides, and enjoy loads more, like the world's largest wave pool and the chance to swim with sharks! When you're ready for the ultimate relaxation, drift around the park through waterfalls and mist streams. Little kids even have their own tyke-sized paradise in Ketchakiddee Creek. At Disney's Typhoon Lagoon, it's a wet adventurous splash for all!_

On Tuesday morning, the group couldn't have picked a better locale for their second day. They'd chosen Typhoon Lagoon, one of the two Disney water parks, at breakfast that morning and no sooner had they decided to spend the day at the water park than they found out the temperature that day would reach ninety-five degrees. So to beat the heat, they boarded the Typhoon Lagoon bus that morning… along with about fifty other people. They definitely weren't the only ones with the idea to stay cool by the pool.

Their t-shirt of the day is mint green with tan, tropical font spelling out the usual message, though they're not really planning to wear them very much. Typhoon Lagoon is the smaller of the two Disney water parks, but is not at all lacking in things to do. In addition to having the world's largest wave pool, Typhoon Lagoon boasts a private beach area, a three-flume water coaster, and the only place on Disney property where you can face your fears and swim with sharks. It's a tropical paradise in the middle of Florida and is everything they can ask for on this intensely hot day.

When they exit the bus and present their park-hopper pass, they enter the park to notice that it isn't as crowded as they'd expected. Obviously people had chosen the other water park instead of Typhoon Lagoon that day and it's something they're grateful for if it means shorter lines and less waiting time. Pierce and Annie each grab a park map, but the group isn't planning on having the structured day they'd had the day before. Their plan for the day is relaxation after the previous four days which had been nonstop action. So, they glance around at the bathing suit-clad park occupants, take in the sun-soaked island paradise, and take off in their own separate directions.

Shirley's not sure how she ended up solo, as most of the group paired off and headed further into the park, but at this point, she really isn't disappointed. She needs some time away from the group, as much as she loves them, for a little self-reflection. Walking through the park, her plaid bathing suit beneath the mint green t-shirt and shorts, Shirley's looking for a little cove of relaxation where she can sit back and watch other people enjoy themselves. She's used to that, as a mom, by now.

Adjacent to the water coaster entitled Crush 'N Gusher, Shirley finds a little closed off area with striped lounge chairs and a small body of water lapping at the realistic sandy shoreline. It's called Sandy White Beach and, since there are no _real_ beaches in central Florida, this is the closest she'll get to one on this vacation. She makes herself comfortable in a lounge chair beneath a palm tree, sets her comically-large bag beside her chair, and lays back, taking in the swishing of the palm fronds, the distant shrieks of laughter, and the relaxing push and pull of the manmade beach beside her.

"Ahh yes," Shirley says to herself, closing her eyes. "Life can't get any better than this."

A little ways over, in the Surf Pool, Abed and Pierce are wading in the surf waters and enjoying the artificially-perfect waves every ninety seconds. Abed is fascinated by the mechanics of it all, as he would be, and is still wondering how the azure waters manage to make each wave the perfect wave. If this was an actual ocean, one might see a perfect wave once a day, maybe. He's floating somewhere in the middle of it all, contemplating this, while Pierce attempts to stand straight, but each time a wave rolls past it manages to knock him off his feet. Every time he's completely shocked by this and each time, he comes up sputtering.

"I don't get it!" Pierce exclaims, standing and righting his glasses again. "How do the waves keep coming?"

"It must be some kind of water mechanism," Abed says, trying to figure it out. "There has to be a way that they're pushing the water towards us. Water vents, returns, something."

Another wave knocks Pierce down as Abed simply wades in it. The former coughs a little, saying, "Wouldn't we see them? Where are they keeping them?"

"Well for starters, those aren't real," Abed informs him, pointing at the wooden gates and piles of fallen tree branches on the opposite side of the wave pool. "So I'd guess there's a few tanks of water behind them… Or _inside_ them…"

"You would be absolutely correct!" A peppy Australian blonde from beside him says. "Hi, I'm Molly! And there are actually about seven or eight tanks that each hold a few thousand gallons of water each."

"Cool," Abed nods. "I'm Abed. This is Pierce."

Pierce goes to wave, but another wave crashes into his body and it ends up looking as though he's saluting her. Molly laughs. "So nice to meet you both! I'm holding surfing lessons on the far side of the pool if you'd like to join? There will be a few other instructors beside myself and around ten people in the class. It's a great way to pick up the beginner moves- and learn a few tricks!"

"I'm in," Abed agrees and then turns to Pierce, who's just learned how to ride the wave and not get taken over by it.

"I can barely stand up," Pierce says. "But why not?"

The two follow Molly, who recruits a few other people, to the far side of the pool where they meet up with three other Typhoon Lagoon employees intent on instructing the class the very basics of surfing. They learn on the sandy area beside the wave pool first; Molly and her colleagues teaching them how to paddle, jump up, and stand, hopefully, as they ride the wave to the shoreline. Once they've all been corrected and approved for the water, Molly and her team lead the way back into the wave pool, park guests seeming to move out of the way for them or even standing back to watch.

"Okay, now these boards are thick and made of foam," Molly shouts, handing one of the giant yellow surfboards to each of the participants. "So they're much easier to use than the standard ones you'd see at a beach. Are you ready?"

Pierce turns to Abed in a panic. "Ay-bed, what if I die?"

Abed claps him on the shoulder and says, "You'll die doing something _awesome_ and that makes it okay."

He still looks a little uneasy, but they both grab their surfboards and paddle into the water. Molly tells them there's no need to wait for the perfect wave since _every_ wave is perfect and to give it a whirl. Abed gives Pierce a curt nod, says, "See you on the other side, Pierce," and hops up onto his board. Somehow, he's a natural, and manages to catch his balance, stand, and make it all the way to shore before he dives sideways toward the water. Pierce takes in a deep breath and a prayer to Buddha before following suit. He's a little wobbly at first and at one point, he almost nosedives, but he manages to make it, shakily, to the shoreline as well.

At that exact moment, Jeff is walking by the wave pool and does a double take. "You have _got_ to be kidding me…"

He watches, still, as Abed and Pierce are taught to do tricks, such as standing on one foot, knee-boarding, and eventually a handstand (Which, Pierce doing a handstand? Priceless) and though they're not exactly professionals and both manage to eat water, Jeff is still speechless and, regrettably, a bit impressed. He shakes his head, chuckling a bit, and Abed waves gleefully to him, seemingly happy to have noticed Jeff watching. Jeff manages a small half-salute back and then cringes as Pierce takes an ungraceful dive face first into the oncoming wave. Jeff snorts and continues walking.

He, like Shirley, had also ended up alone when the group split up earlier that morning. Pierce and Abed had made a beeline for the wave pool, Britta had gone after Troy and Annie, who had insulted her by saying she didn't know how to have fun, in an effort to prove them wrong, and Shirley had noticed a shady beachside and said something about taking a nap in the sun. And he, Jeff, hadn't really done anything. He's been walking around the park the entire morning and is, now, just starting to realize it's almost noon. A few feet away from the opening of the Surf Pool is Crush Hot Dog Cart, which Jeff visits for a quick lunch and then heads back on his journey around the park.

Jeff comes upon Castaway Creek, then, and decides to give it a whirl. It's Typhoon Lagoon's version of the lazy river, a constantly flowing, slow-moving, winding river around the entire park. He grabs a blue-and-yellow striped inner tube, descends the few stairs into the tepid aquamarine water, and begins to float lazily around the park. It's nice and relaxing and he's getting to see the attractions he hadn't yet experienced- the water coaster, the racing slides, and even the kids-only area entitled Ketchakiddee Creek. He swipes his sunglasses from his eyes so he won't get one of those cheap tans and lies back against the tube, eyes closed in relaxation.

It's only a moment later when he opens his eyes again after being squirted directly in the face by a water cannon under one of the many bridges. This was relaxing for the first twenty minutes, but now he's _bored_. It's weird; the thing he's desired the most ever since leaving Colorado is alone time, but now that he's gotten it, he's actually kind of lonely. The Greendale study group drives him absolutely _insane_… but they're his only real family and he loves them. He's passing by the stairs once more when he suddenly jumps out of his tube and heads back up the stairs. He's getting extremely fed up with his boredom and decides, in the spur of the moment, to head out and find someone to spend time with.

Meanwhile, Troy, Annie, and Britta have just landed with a splash into the pool at the bottom of Keelhaul Falls, the mildest of the three "Falls" rides, and when the three have surfaced, Britta says, "See? I can be fun."

"Yeah," Annie says lightly, unconvincingly, but Troy laughs.

"One waterslide, Britta?" He asks, incredulous. "It's going to take a little more than that to prove you know how to have fun."

"Fine," She stands, grabbing her tube and heading towards the stairs. "Bring it on."

"Well, let's go down Mayday Falls, then?" Annie suggests. "It's supposedly the wildest of the three."

"Yeah, I'm ready," Britta agrees as the three head into the shadows of the shrimping boat, Miss Tilly.

The line is fairly short for Mayday Falls, the wild turbulent rapids ride with dips, swerves, and curves. The flume goes through caves and waterfalls, soaking each of them before they fly off the end and land in the pool with a gigantic splash. Britta, who'd gone first defiantly, had gotten half of the pool up her nose, and was gagging and coughing on the side by the time Troy and Annie- the former whooping with pleasure, the latter shrieking with glee- catch up to her. Annie, immediately in a panic, asks, "Oh my God! Are you okay?"

"Annie, I'm fine," Britta sputters. "Ah, the chlorine _burns!_"

"Yeah," She smiles sympathetically. "You're not really supposed to ingest that."

"You want to take a break?" Troy asks, wringing out the ends of his crimson bathing suit.

"Hell no!" Britta declines, sniffling and trying to clear her nasal cavity. "Did you guys see that big one? Humonga Kowabunga? The racing slide? It is _on_."

They nearly race to the top of the free-body slide, where the ride attendant, once they get to the front of the line, tells them, "Welcome to Humonga Kowabunga! This is a 214-foot-long free-body slide in complete darkness with five-story, near vertical drops. Drop in… if you dare!"

"Please," Britta snorts, before pushing herself down the middle slide. "You do not intimidate me."

"Oh," Troy, from the left slide, says to Annie, on the right slide. "I thought she was going to make a comment about living in New York again."

Annie giggles. "Well, the day's not over yet!"

But it actually _is_ a bit intimidating, Britta has to admit, being enclosed in a dark flume and not knowing which way you're going to turn next. There are a few times where she drops unexpectedly- and quite uncomfortably- before splashing this way and that and, eventually, coming to that five-story drop. Her stomach leaps and for a moment she thinks she isn't enjoying it and maybe, just maybe, Troy and Annie _were_ right when they'd said she didn't know how to have fun. But then the slide begins to lighten and she comes to a speeding stop at the end of the slide, finally in the sunlight again, and she realizes that, hey, that slide was actually pretty awesome.

Forty-five seconds later, when Troy and Annie come to the same speeding end, with the latter adjusting her polka dot bikini, Britta shouts triumphantly, "Ha! I beat you both! Rematch? I'll just crush you again!"

Troy shakes his head immediately. "No, no, I think… We should go do the water coaster now."

Annie is laughing when she says, "Troy screamed like _such_ a little girl! Did you hear him?"

"No," The look on Britta's face seems to say she's never been this happy. "Wow Troy. Who doesn't know how to have fun _now_?"

"Hey, it was really dark in there," Troy defends. "And they were _very_ manly screams!"

"Whatever," Britta laughs. "Let's go take on that Crush 'N Gusher. It looks _awesome!_"

She hurries ahead of them, towards the other end of the park where the water coaster's located, and Annie tells Troy, "I think we may have underestimated her."

Troy nods his agreement as they jog to keep up with Britta, who's already in line. The Crush 'N Gusher water coaster has three distinct flumes that offer guests three different ride experiences, so Britta's chosen the Pineapple Plunger, to begin with. It's three to a tube, so with Troy in the back, Britta in the middle, and Annie riding in the very front, they take off down and around the gravity-defying waterslide. It's a white-knuckle thrill ride and all three of them are screaming, but it's also an absolute blast and the moment they've landed safely in the pool, they jump out of the water and head for the line to go again.

Jeff passes the three as he heads over to find Shirley and chuckles at everyone's eager attitude towards the water coaster, since Annie's a fan of mild-rides only and Britta, supposedly, didn't know how to have fun. But they're drenched from head to toe and grinning like complete fools, so they're obviously having a great time. He chuckles and wishes them a great trip down the flume before walking a bit further and into Sandy White Beach. It's not long before he finds Shirley propped up on a lounge chair, sipping a tropical juice, and reading _The Great Gatsby_.

"Oh, Gatsby, huh?" Jeff comments as Shirley looks up. "A classic."

"Hi Jeffrey," She greets him warmly, replacing her bookmark and tossing the book into her bag. "Well, I haven't read it since high school and the movie's coming out soon and everything. I thought I'd refresh my memory."

"Yeah that sounds like a plan," Jeff nods and Shirley chuckles.

"Are you bored, Jeffrey?" She asks him and he simply nods again. "That's what I figured. You know, it was your idea to have a day of relaxation…"

"I know and I think I've exploited it for all it's worth," Jeff tells her honestly. "But I have to do something now. I can't just sit in a tube all day. I'm going out of my mind."

"I'll be happy to ride with you," Shirley says, packing up her things and standing. "Something mild, though. Not that crazy in the dark one Annie just texted me about."

"The Storm Slides over there don't look too bad," Jeff suggests and Shirley agrees, so they begin their trek to the attraction.

While in line, Shirley comments, "I'll have to get the boys here, someday. They would love this place."

"You've never taken the kids to Disney World?" Jeff asks. "They could've come with us this week."

Shirley shakes her head. "Andre and I took them years ago, but Ben's never been. But believe me, I needed the break. I love my boys to death, Jeffrey, you know that. But I always do _everything_. I'd love to know how Andre's fairing."

Jeff's eyes widen. "You haven't spoken to them?"

"Andre and I _aren't_ speaking right now," Shirley sighs sadly. "We both said some things we didn't mean and he insinuated that my job wasn't that hard. I told him that if thought that then maybe he should try to do it himself and… well, here I am. I call the boys every night, but… I haven't spoken to Andre since we left."

"Wow," Jeff says because he's not really sure what else to say. "Well I think you're a great mother, Shirley, and I know how hard this is for you, trying to balance school and spending time with the boys. So he'll be calling you any day now with an apology."

Shirley giggles. "I hope so."

They've reached the front of the line, now, and each step into their individual, open Storm Slide. It's thrilling and speedy as they zip through caves, waterfalls, and geysers before eventually landing with a plop into the cool waters of the pool. Shirley's laughing when she stands and tells Jeff she didn't know the slides could be that fun. Jeff, this too being his first slide of the day, agrees. They both exit the pool and then meet up with Troy, Annie and Britta, who are soaked to the bone, teeth-chattering with excitement, and state they're looking for Abed and Pierce so they can do Gang Plank Falls, the group inner tube ride. On their way to the attraction they find the two in question and the group is reunited.

The afternoon is waning into evening and the blazing sun is finally sinking lower and lower into the pink sky as the study group heads up towards the line for Gang Plank Falls. On the slopes of Mount Mayday, the group goes careening down Gang Plank Falls in a family-sized raft and through special effects, rock formations, and waterfalls. They don't get very wet, but they do have a lot of fun, and when they finish the ride, they stop for a quick dinner before heading towards their final attraction for the evening- Shark Reef.

It's after six o'clock, with only two hours before the park closes, when they enter Shark Reef and Abed's quick to say, "I think we're gonna need a bigger boat."

"Thank you, for that," Jeff says sarcastically. "Isn't sundown sharks' feeding time? This is an _awful_ idea."

"If we leave the park without swimming with sharks, I will legit never speak to you again," Troy tells the group.

"Is that a promise?" Jeff asks but his sardonic question falls on deaf ears when the rest of the group sees the pool they'll be swimming in and all begin talking at once.

"Whoa, those are _real_ sharks!" Britta shrieks. "Look how huge that one is!"

"Real sharks means real_ teeth_," Pierce stresses. "I've been bitten by a lot of things- dogs, monkeys, women- but _never_ by a shark."

"Oh Lord, I'm gonna die," Shirley moans, making the sign of the cross over her heart. "Lord have mercy on us."

"I don't want to get in there!" Annie shouts. "Do you see that stingray? I do _not_ plan on becoming the next Steve Irwin."

"You guys, this is perfectly safe," Troy tells the skeptic group. "If it wasn't, do you think it would be an attraction? Besides, we're not _swimming_ with them. We're just snorkeling! Millions of people snorkel everyday and they're perfectly fine!"

They do look slightly appeased at this, so Abed and Troy slip on lifejackets and snorkel masks per the attendant's request and the rest of the group follows suit. Annie's visibly shaking, Britta's muttering about the risks of the procedure, Shirley's still praying and Jeff and Pierce are arguing about who the sharks will eat first, but Abed and Troy share their handshake, sing, "Troy and Abed in the Shark Reef!" and jump into the pool. Annie shrieks and turns away, but the splash scares most of the fish away and soon, one by one, they all follow. Britta takes a deep breath and jumps in, Annie shakes her head but goes in anyway, and Shirley, Jeff, and Pierce all express their distaste for the current activity before taking part in it.

But once they're over the fear and expressions of insanity, it's actually a beautiful experience. Through the large coral reef, they're snorkeling with many schools of tropical fish, stingrays, and leopard and bonnethead sharks, none of which come even remotely close to the group, so their fears are completely lost and instead are replaced by awe and wonder. It's absolutely wonderful and, as their time in the water comes to an end, they had even wished for it to be longer. Abed makes a few thousand _Jaws_ references but otherwise, the moment is absolutely perfect.

They end the day with a picture- Abed and Troy are holding a live shark, it's mouth taped to avoid injury. The rest of the group is crowded around the two, each with one hand on the slimy gray animal. Annie is smiling but looks slightly terrified, Britta looks scandalized, Shirley looks as though she's being tortured, Jeff appears uninterested, and Pierce isn't looking at the camera. Upon viewing the photo at the kiosk, everyone thinks they look awful, except Troy and Abed, who order seven prints and hand one out to everyone.

The picture may not have been perfect, but it's them.


	6. On the Fast Track

**Hello all! Okay I have a few things I have to say to preface this chapter. One- the italicized paragraph at the beginning is from the video on Epcot's website, as the past few have been. Two- the part where they go on Test Track isn't completely accurate, because Test Track is currently closed until fall 2012 for refurbishment. Oh well. It's called fiction people. And three, and this is the big one- I'm about to make you non-shippers or shippers of other ships _very_ unhappy. I apologize and will not take any offense if you want to discontinue reading.  
**

**Alright, now that all of that BS is out of the way, please enjoy!  
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Early Modern Fantasy

Chapter Six: On the Fast Track

"_Epcot- there's no place like it on Earth. Disney Imagineers innovated awesome attractions and entertainment that let you do things you never imagined. The possibilities are endless! Where else can you rocket into the future and blast to the past? Or see the world in a whole new light and glimpse where humankind will go in the years ahead. Let your little ones dive into adventure and take the family on an exhilarating tour of eleven countries! You'll meet some interesting characters along the way and share good times with friends and family! Experience a memorable end to your night with totally explosive excitement!_

It's Wednesday June twentieth and the Greendale study group is onboard the bus to Epcot. They'd chosen Epcot completely at random that day, their only park requirement had been to not pick another water park immediately after the previous day's jaunt at Typhoon Lagoon. Epcot is open this day from nine a.m. until nine p.m., so it gives them a full twelve hours of Epcot-inspired fun. It is exactly nine o'clock when they exit the bus, present their passes, and enter the park to the most spectacular view of Epcot's magnificent polyhedral icon. They take a few photos and one fantastic group photo before they're on their way.

Epcot is both the most realistic and the most out-of-this-world park in all of Walt Disney World. Not only is it twice the size of Magic Kingdom, but it boasts rides with futuristic designs and tendencies and the ever-popular World Showcase, in which eleven spectacular countries are represented. Britta decides, right then and there, that this is going to be her favorite park because all kinds of countries and nationalities are being represented. No one in the group is very surprised by this admission but they don't poke fun at her, so they've clearly come a very long way.

The three major rides in Epcot- Soarin', Mission: Space and Test Track- are already beginning to attract many people, so the group goes to each ride and buys Fast Passes for the evening, after they're done with everything else, so they'll be able to guarantee themselves a spot. Then, once the passes are bought and stored safely in Shirley's purse, they grab a few park maps and pore over what to do first. The park is divided into two specific neighborhoods- Future World, with all of the rides, and World Showcase, with the eleven country pavilions. They decide, then, to tackle all of the ride-y type things in the morning, break for lunch, and then head into the World Showcase for the afternoon.

It's not quite as hot today as it was the day before, but Florida in June means they still welcome the air conditioning when they step into line for the first ride of the day, Spaceship Earth. Everything is under black light and the writing on their t-shirt of the day- a deep purple with silver, futuristic font- is glowing, making everyone stare. Troy is bouncing excitedly as the line moves fairly continuously and says, "I cannot _wait_. My cousin just came here and says he almost threw up on this ride. That's how intense it is. It's supposed to match the feelings of actually going into space."

"Um, Troy," Annie corrects gently. "That's _Mission: _Space, not this one. This one's pretty chill, I think."

His face falls. "Oh… Yeah, that makes more sense."

"Well according to the park map," Britta reads. "This is a sixteen-minute ride through space and time for guests of all ages. Sounds lame."

"Incredibly lame," Jeff agrees, snatching the park map from her and reading the description for himself. "Ugh. Let's hope it doesn't suck as bad as it sounds."

They board the little spaceship that blasts them through the past, showing prehistoric men just learning to make fire, ancient Egyptian hieroglyphics, and the streets of Rome before journeying into the Industrial Revolution and the Age of Information. It's actually pretty interesting… to Annie. Shirley pays attention for a little while before growing bored and no one else really gets into it. When they leave Spaceship Earth, they head next door to Ellen's Energy Adventure, a ride through the Dinosaur Age, narrated by Ellen DeGeneres.

"Ooh, that's nice!" Shirley claps excitedly as they get into the oversized Jeep for the ride to begin. "I love Ellen! I watch her show all the time!"

"Ha! You love her so much, why don't you marry her?" Pierce teases. "She'll never find a guy anyway."

"No, she won't," Annie says slowly. "Because she's already married to a _woman_."

Pierce gasps. "You brought me on a ride hosted by a _lesbian_?"

There are a few gasps of shock in front of them and Jeff placates them by saying, "We're sorry about him. He's _mentally incapacitated_."

They nod their understanding and Pierce asks, "What? What did you say?"

"It's okay, buddy, we'll get you back to the home real soon," Jeff pats Pierce's shoulder and the others smirk in response.

As usual, Ellen's commentary is hilarious and they're so distracted by their laughter, they don't even really notice the dinosaurs, the message about conserving energy, or the fact that the ride is over. They're considering riding again until Annie shrieks about riding The Seas with Nemo and Friends and the moment is lost. It is most definitely a kids ride, but the weather it for Annie's sake anyway, riding through in their seashells as they pass underwater coral reefs, Marlin and Dory searching for Nemo, and schools of colorful fish led by Mr. Ray and passing by Crush. It's actually pretty adorable, so they don't tease Annie too long for wanting to ride it.

They view a few shows before deciding to go on the attention-catching boat ride entitled Living with the Land. It had sounded intriguing from the short ride description on the park map, but once the group is riding the boat through the huge greenhouses growing produce through innovative technologies, it's clear that it's losing everyone's attention and fast. Everyone, that is, except Britta, who's eyes are wide with wonder and she looks absolutely thrilled to be a part of this fantastic journey. Their ride attendant is informing them all about the advances in aquaculture and desert farming as well as how the greenhouses are used to not only test new ways to cultivate produce, but also to grow produce for the many restaurants situated in Epcot.

"Wow, isn't that fascinating?" Britta asks, turning to her side, where Jeff's nodded off. She frowns and smacks him awake.

"Huh? What did I miss?" He asks and she rolls her eyes.

"How could you fall asleep?" She hisses. "This is _so_ interesting!"

"Boring is the word you _meant_ to say, right?" Jeff corrects. "Who gives a shit about some dumb plants?"

"Obviously you do, or you wouldn't have gotten on the ride," Britta replies. "But seriously, think about it. If this continues on the path it's on, we could possibly solve world hunger. I mean look at all the ways scientists have come up with to help farmers prepare for the food needs of the world's nations. It's _amazing_."

"Slow down there, Oprah," Jeff tells her. "Epcot hasn't solved anything and if you're saying that _Disney_ is somehow going to save the planet, there might be something _seriously_ wrong with you."

Britta frowns. "Why am I friends with you, again?"

Jeff chuckles as the boat comes to a stop and everyone exits back into the park. The morning has sped by extremely fast and now it's nearing lunch time. They decide to split for lunch; Pierce, Troy, and Shirley head left while Jeff, Annie, Britta, and Abed head right around the World Showcase. Shirley comments that she absolutely _needs_ to have authentic pretzels from Germany and Pierce shares his love of bratwurst, so the two take Troy, who's never had either, in that direction. Britta nearly has a heart attack when she sees the replica of the Eiffel Tower and decides that's where she's eating, so Jeff, who's talking big game about eating escargot, follows her. Annie and Abed, however, head to Italy.

Walking through the beautifully-patterned streets, modeled after those in Venice, Abed and Annie find themselves immersed in the Italian culture- bridges, gondolas, colorful barber poles, the Neptune fountain, and the replica of the Campanile of St. Mark's Square. It's absolutely gorgeous and the two marvel for a little while on the scenic area before choosing an Italian restaurant for lunch, Abed pausing to hold the door like a perfect gentleman and then whispering something in their waiter's ear once they'd been seated.

Annie eyes him suspiciously. "What are you doing?"

"Ordering ahead," He lies. "So… Do you like the park so far?"

"Yeah," Annie nods brightly. "I've never been to Epcot. I've actually never been to any of the parks, except Magic Kingdom. My parents took me there a few months before they got divorced. When I told my Mom we were coming here, she said that Disney brings back bad memories, but I don't think so. I think it brings back the only _good_ memories we ever had before all the bad stuff set in."

"Yeah, I know what you mean." Abed says sympathetically. "I've never been to Disney World. My Mom used to talk about it all the time, how it would be good for me and how we needed a vacation, but my Dad always said he was too busy with the restaurant to take time off. Eventually she got fed up with his falafel obsession and left us… And I never got to go to Disney."

Annie shakes her head sadly, but says, to brighten the mood, "It's everything I expected it to be, though. It really is magical."

Abed smiles. "It's about to get better."

Before she can ask what he means, two waiters come over and bring them a heaping bowl of spaghetti and meatballs. Annie's eyes are wide with awe and excitement, but that's not the only trick Abed's got up his sleeve. The waiters then produce musical instruments; the one with the accordion beginning to sing, "_This is the night. It's a beautiful night. And we call it bella notte. Look at the skies. They have stars in their eyes. On this lovely bella notte…_"

Annie grins gleefully. "_Lady and the Tramp_?"

"What better place to do a movie reference?" Abed asks, beginning to slurp the noodles. "And especially this one."

"I have never been happier with your choices," Annie tells him with a giggle and begins to eat too.

Abed, noticing the exact cluster of noodles Annie's twisting onto her fork, follows suit and begins his quest to further the movie reference. He finds a particular strand of spaghetti, a long winding one, and slurps one end into his mouth just as Annie, joyfully, does the same with the other end. Their eyes lock as the noodle gets smaller and smaller and they grow closer and closer until finally, the noodle's disappeared behind their interlocked lips. They're kissing in an Italian restaurant at Epcot, two waiters singing _Bella Notte_ and a plate of forgotten spaghetti beside them, but somehow none of this seems to matter. The song's finished, the waiters move on, and people come and go, but when the two separate, they do not notice a single thing.

They head towards the United Kingdom just as Troy, Shirley, and Pierce finish their lunch in Germany, poke around for a little, and then set off around the World Showcase. Shirley and Troy had spent the entire time they were in Germany apologizing for Pierce's rude and obnoxious behavior; he'd made obscene gestures, referenced World War II innumerous times, and when the waiter forgot to split the check in threes, Pierce had called him a Nazi. When they left Germany, Shirley gave him a stern talking to about his behavior and that, if it didn't improve, he'd be abandoned. It hadn't done much to scare him.

They enter China next and Pierce immediately has a comment. "Ha! Communists. I don't know why they're even a country."

"Pierce," Shirley warns. "Be respectful."

"How can I respect them if they don't respect themselves?" Pierce asks. "I mean, they let that bastard Mao guy control their every move!"

"Pierce, that guy died like thirty years ago," Troy shakes his head. "You gotta keep up with the times, man."

"He did?" Pierce asks and the other two nod. "Well shouldn't communism have died then too?"

A Chinese woman does a double take as she passes Pierce and he shouts at her back, "What? Are you going to pull a Tiananmen Square and run me over with a tank?"

"Okay, he knows what that is but he doesn't know that Mao Zedong is dead?" Troy asks Shirley who shrugs.

"Pierce," She pleads angrily. "That is _enough_."

"Why don't you go throw your baby girl off a cliff?" Pierce yells. "You know how you people hate women!"

They're attracting stares now, so Troy and Shirley usher him out of China and into Norway. Shirley tells Troy, "I mean it. I'm at the end of my string with him. One more thing out of him and I'm pushing him into the lake."

Troy nods his agreement as they take in the full view of the Scandinavian architecture of Norway. It's based heavily on the Vikings and Norse art, which gets Pierce to say, "I don't know why the Norwegians are all so afraid of trolls. They all _look_ like trolls!"

"That's it," Shirley mutters but then covers this with her super-sweet tone. "Pierce, look! They have a ride called _Maelstrom_. It's supposed to be a Viking adventure! Would you like to ride?"

"Yeah, can't hurt," Pierce nods and once they get far enough in line, Shirley and Troy slowly back away, navigating through the line of people before they're out in the open once more.

"We are _awful_ people," Troy says. "But he was getting on my last nerve."

Shirley agrees and the two head into Mexico. "We did what we had to do. Come on. I want a churro."

Meanwhile, on the other side of the World Showcase, Jeff and Britta had left France for its neighbor, Morocco, and are shopping around in one of the little trinkets stores. Much to Britta's surprise, Jeff had actually manned up and tried the escargot she'd told him was so delicious, only to find that it tasted like complete shit and he'd proceeded to spit it back into the napkin. Karma, Britta tells him, for making ride the Tower of Terror on Monday and Jeff doesn't bother to mention that no one had forced her to do anything. She chuckles, now, at the memory and continues to sift aimlessly through gorgeous Arabian jewelry, Jeff somewhere on the other side of the store.

"If you ask me," A tall, thin man with a thick Moroccan accent approaches her and reaches over to lift a genuine turquoise necklace from the basket beside her. "I believe this would look perfect on you."

"Do you think so?" She asks and then turns to find the most remarkable brown eyes she's ever seen. "I've… I've never been a fan of turquoise."

"Ah, then you haven't found the right piece," He tells her, unclasping the necklace, sweeping her hair back, and placing it around her neck. "There. It's gorgeous just like you."

"Thank you," Britta says quietly. She's blushing intensely and she absolutely hates it.

"I am Samir," He introduces. "What is your name?"

"Britta," She shakes his hand when he offers it to her. "Are you, like, actually from Morocco?"

"Yes, I was born there," Samir explains. "I moved here with my brothers a few years ago. And where are you from?"

"Colorado," Britta chuckles. "Nowhere exciting."

"Colorado? I've never been there."

"You're not missing anything," Britta tells him and he laughs.

"You are funny, Britta," Samir grins. "I would like to take you out sometime. On a date. How long are you here for?"

It's a bit blunt, but she's about to accept. That is, until a certain ex-lawyer decides to ruin the moment. He strides over, drapes an arm around Britta's shoulders, and says, "Hi honey, I'm sorry. That line was _super_ long. Oh, who's your new friend?"

Britta shoots him a 'have you lost your _mind_?' look and Samir colors and begins to back away. "I am Samir and I am very sorry, Britta, I didn't know. Have a great day."

He flees like someone's set him on fire and the moment he's gone, Britta shoves Jeff's arm off of her shoulders and shouts, "What the hell was that?"

"Um, you should be saying thank you," Jeff tells her. "I just saved you from that creep."

"I didn't need 'saving' and he's not a creep!" Britta insists, removing the turquoise necklace and exiting the store, Jeff hot on her heels. "What are you, my older brother? A jealous ex-boyfriend?"

"How about an upstanding friend who was helping another friend in need?" Jeff suggests and Britta scoffs.

"How did that even remotely look like I was in need?" She implores, incredulous. "I was just trying to talk to this nice guy-"

"Nice guy? He was like undressing you with his eyes!" Jeff argues as they leave Morocco and enter the adjacent Japan. "He was all over you. Plus he wanted to take you on a date after knowing you for what, ten seconds? Don't you think that's sketchy?"

"So? You only knew me for ten seconds before you wanted to get in my pants!" Britta points out and, well, he has to give her that. She sighs. "You're just jealous."

"Psh, yeah _right_," He states unconvincingly. "Jeff Winger does _not_ get jealous."

"Um, yeah, you do," Britta disagrees. "You're like the most jealous person I know because you don't know what you want."

Jeff stops walking. "I know what I want."

Britta stops, too. "Oh yeah? And what is that?"

He stares at her a long time, but doesn't answer. They continue into Japan and drop the subject completely.

A little after two o'clock, they all meet up again in front of Soarin' so they can use their Fast Passes, get to the front of the line, and experience this ride for themselves. They're seated in the hang glider as the entire room comes to life and soon, they're soaring over the impressive state of California. As they fly above orange groves, forests, and oceans, they smell the citrusy, evergreen, and salty sea air scents that fill the entire room and, at one point, dip so close to the Pacific Ocean they're sure their toes will get wet. The ride ends with explosive fireworks all around them until they're settled back on the ground once more.

The next attraction is the ever-popular Mission: Space. It's the most realistic space simulator- so, nothing like the KFC bus- the world's ever seen and it should be, considering it was designed and built by NASA. They choose the original Orange Team, which is the more intense version of the ride and strap into their assigned roles. And as their ship dips, rolls, and spins, they feel _everything_. It legitimately feels as though they've launched into space as they experience forces up to 2.4G, more than twice the force of Earth's gravitational pull. When they exit this ride, they're dazed and disoriented and both Pierce and Shirley excuse themselves to the bathrooms to vomit.

Finally, they are all set to experience the final ride for the night, Test Track. It's based on the tests engineers and mechanics run on cars when they're building them not only for professional races but also for the general public. They spend the beginning viewing first how are cars are put together and the intricate interweaving of machinery it takes to make everything run the way it should. And then, finally, they're ushered into the unfinished vehicle for all of the tests. They run all kinds of tests while the group sits back and enjoys the ride; they turn off the lights and test the headlights, they show the guests what it feels like when the brakes fail, and what it feels like when they work the way they're supposed to.

"Wow, I never want to experience _that_ in real life," Shirley says in paranoia, trying to calm her heart rate. "It looked like we were going to smash into the wall."

"My brakes failed once and I drove into oncoming traffic," Pierce tells the group. "I don't remember what happened, after that. I woke up in the hospital five days later."

They stare at him and Abed utters, "That explains a lot."

The car is propelled forward to test its reaction to extreme heat and soon, everyone in the car is _sweltering_ under the desert-like heat. "Oh come on," Britta moans. "As if it's not hot enough outside already!"

"I hear ya," Pierce agrees. "I've been sweating like a dog in a Chinese restaurant all day!"

"I guess leaving him in Norway didn't solve the race problem, did it?" Troy mutters to Shirley, who shakes her head bitterly.

After the room with the sweltering heat, the car is pushed forward into extreme cold. We're talking arctic, here, and though it feels good for just a moment and cools them down, eventually, they begin to shiver. Annie's full of goose bumps and her teeth are chattering when she says, "Hey, we got to visit eleven countries _and_ Alaska today."

"Yeah, it is pretty cold in here," Jeff agrees, inching closer to Britta and Pierce for warmth.

"Why do they need to test a car's reactivity to the cold?" Abed asks. "Especially in Florida."

But no one has the chance to answer his question because the door to the room opens and they're suddenly accelerating quickly towards a giant yellow wooden door. It seems as though they'll crash through it, but thankfully it moves just in time and then they're speeding down a raceway, going sixty miles an hour, racing on the track for a victory lap. It's the closest any one of them will ever get to driving a _real_ racecar, so they're thoroughly enjoying speeding down the track as though their lives depended on it. It's an absolute blast but the line's too long to bother riding it again and as it's almost six thirty, they decide to find some dinner before the nightly fireworks.

The only country they hadn't visited earlier in the afternoon was America, so to be completely lame, they get burgers, hot dogs, and French fries for dinner. And then, as the sun completely disappears and the sky turns as purple as their t-shirts, the group finds themselves a few good spots along the lake for the nightly firework display, IllumiNations. It's a three-act, fourteen-minute story told through lasers, water cannons and the most gorgeously explosive fireworks they'd ever seen. They're all paying close attention, watching the show liven even the most tired of guests.

Britta turns to her right, towards Jeff, and expresses, "Oh my God. This is _amazing_, isn't it?"

And Jeff looks at her, watches the fireworks explode in her brilliant blue eyes, and says, "Yeah. It's beautiful."


	7. Disney After Dark

**Hey guys! So this chapter took a little bit longer to write than I would have liked, but I got it out here and that's all that matters haha. I hate to take up more time addressing this, but it needs to be said- I'm not sure if you've realized this, but this is _my_ story. Therefore, I will not be bending to anyone's requests or complaints. So taking the time to review and complain that you don't like my pairings is a waste of your time and mine. There are _plenty_ of other stories on FanFiction that I'm sure you'd enjoy. No one's forcing you to read mine.  
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**With that said, thank you to those of you who've reviewed with _constructive_ criticism! It means SO much that you're enjoying and I'm so glad you like it! Thank you and enjoy!  
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Early Modern Fantasy

Chapter Seven: Disney After Dark

"_This is the Downtown Disney Area. Everything you need to eat, shop and be merry is right here! Over seventy unique stores and restaurants. Browse an array of shops that offer everything from the art of Disney to the art of the motorcycle! And pick up anything from the hottest surf gear to the finest cigar. Sample hot Latin rhythms and food at Bongo's Cuban Café and live performances from some of the top names on the circuit at the House of Blues, where they serve some great southern-inspired cooking, too! And get your Irish on at Raglan Road Irish pub and restaurant with great food and nightly entertainment. And if you're in the mood for outstanding entertainment, don't miss Cirque du Soleil. That's right, _the_ Cirque du Soleil, right here in Florida, with a show called La Nouba. It's only here and it's absolutely one of the most amazing things you'll ever see!_"

Thursday June twenty-first, Annie Edison, forever the earliest riser, wakes up to find the gorgeous Disney property they're staying in being pelted with thick raindrops, the sky an angry grey, the clouds dark and billowing. This put quite the damper on their plans for the day, namely because they had planned on another park, obviously, and walking and standing around in the rain isn't exactly enjoyable. Around nine a.m., they meet for breakfast and discuss a backup plan for the day, since by the time they're all dressed and seated in the restaurant, the storm has picked up immensely, thunder exploding in the sky and lightening illuminating even the darkest of clouds.

The thing is, though there is plenty to do within Disney's Old Key West Resort, namely bike and boat rentals, basketball courts, and a golf course among other things, nearly every kind of recreational activity takes place outdoors. There's a fitness center and an arcade, but no one feels like working out while on vacation and there's only so many times you can play Whack-A-Mole before wanting to smash the mallet into your own head. Around noon, when they've exhausted all possibilities, they're sitting in the lobby chatting and resting their forever aching feet when they realize the storm is passing and the sky is getting considerably lighter. The rain has slowed to a miserable drizzle, but they realize maybe their day had been a waste, but their night didn't have to be.

They decide to spend their evening at Downtown Disney, the strip of restaurants, shops, and clubs only a short five-minute bus ride away from their resort. Abed scores them tickets to Cirque du Soleil at seven fifteen, so they figure they'll head over around five o'clock for dinner and then go to the show. They're excited now, knowing their night won't be as boring as the day had been, and head off to their respective rooms to get ready. No special t-shirts tonight; instead, the guys dress nicely in dark jeans and button downs, while the girls take to wearing dresses or skirts. At five p.m. on the dot and under a slight spitting of rain, they board the bus to Downtown Disney and they're off.

It's larger than they'd expected, but then again, this _is_ Disney, whose properties are never anything shorter than impressive. They exit the bus near A Parking, which is in the Marketplace, a section of Downtown Disney that hosts restaurants and shops galore. Pierce, their park map guy, finds the stand nearby and comes back with seven, handing them to each member before they stroll further into the Marketplace to find a place to eat. There's an array of meal options, from sandwich shops and fast food restaurants to seafood shacks and sit-down locales and at first, the group can't decide. They walk through Downtown Disney with their eyes and ears open, before Annie suggests they dine at the Rainforest Café and everyone, especially Britta, agrees.

It is _packed_ and getting a table for seven takes a half hour of waiting, but then they're finally seated beneath the dewy rainforest canopy, the chirping of birds and howling of monkeys heard in the distance. Britta gasps and points to the bottom of the menu, reading aloud, "Look! Ten percent of every check is donated to charities involved with saving the rainforests!"

"Wow, dinner and charity work," Jeff smirks. "Color me surprised."

"No! I'm not going to tolerate your cynicism," Annie insists. "Tonight is a fun night out with friends and we are _all_ going to have a good time!"

"Oh no," Troy groans. "You're not going to become Caroline from Corpus Christi again, are you?"

Annie giggles. "No! I don't need to be Caroline to have fun, especially with you guys. We've been having fun all week, it's just that tonight seems… different. I don't know why. We didn't go to a park today, so maybe that's it."

"Yeah, tonight does seem kind of different," Shirley agrees. "I think that's a good thing. We're going to have a great time tonight!"

"I agree," Abed nods, brandishing the menu. "Now, who wants in on the Awesome Appetizer Adventure?"

A chorus of agreement fills the air. Britta pores over the description. "Ideal for two or more, featuring our Chimi-Cha-Chas, Spinach & Artichoke Dip with tri-colored tortilla chips, Cheese Sticks and Chicken Tenders. Served with fresh guacamole, marinara and coconut curry sauce… What the _hell_ is a Chimi-Cha-Cha?"

"It's like a pot sticker," Annie tells her. "Kind of like Chinese dumplings, I guess."

"Well you can put coconut on _anything_ and I'll eat it," Pierce says and everyone grimaces at the thought. "I'm in."

They put their order in, not only for the appetizer but their meals as well, and return to discussing their evening. Shirley grins excitedly. "There's so much to do, I don't know what I want to do first! Gourmet candy stores, the World of Disney… Oh, I'll have to stop in the LEGO Imagination Center for the boys! They love LEGOs."

"Ooh, they have that amazing store, Disney Days of Christmas," Annie points out on the map. "They have the most amazing ornaments and Christmas decorations I have _ever_ seen."

"Who wants to think about Christmas in June?" Britta asks and Annie wrinkles her nose. "I have one place in mind and one place only- the House of Blues."

"You got it!" Pierce agrees. "Anyone who wants to be _anyone_ in rock 'n roll gets their start there."

"Lame," Troy frowns. "Who wants to waste their time listening to music when you can go to DisneyQuest?"

All of them, except Abed, stare at Troy as though he's speaking another language. Finally Annie asks, "And DisneyQuest would be…?"

Troy gasps in horror, holding a hand over his heart, and Abed shakes his head disapprovingly, saying, "It's only the most magnificent indoor virtual theme park _ever_."

"_The most magnificent indoor virtual theme park ever!_" Troy repeats. "How could you not know?"

"Never heard of it," Jeff tells the two who shake their heads in shock. "But it figures that the one day we don't go to a theme park you want to spend your night in one."

"What are you planning on doing with your night, Jeff?" Britta asks and the latter smirks.

"I'm going to get a drink," Jeff answers as if it's obvious. "There has to be some place around here that's adults-only."

Some chuckle, some roll their eyes, but they have to agree that his answer is so typical _Jeff_. When food is delivered, they share the appetizer and eat their meals in contemplative silence, thinking not only of the night ahead, but of the rest of their vacation. Following tonight, there are only three days left before they leave for Colorado bright and early Monday morning. Not one of them is looking forward to driving three additional days, nor are they excited to be leaving their cozy Disney sanctuary, but unfortunately, all good things must come to an end.

Meals finished and paid for, they head into the night air, rain still spitting at them from the thick clouds above, and down the strip towards the West Side, where the theater is located. It's a little after seven, now, and they make it just in time to hand in their tickets and find their nosebleed seats for Cirque du Soleil, La Nouba. It's no wonder the tickets were so cheap; their seats are absolutely _awful_. The flipping acrobats and the tricks of the trade are so tiny, it's like they're barely watching anything at all. At intermission, they buy cheap binoculars and feel like they're at the opera, but the second half of the show is much more enjoyable.

Upon the completion of the show, they all exit into the moonlit strip and try to come to an agreement upon where to go next, but realize their interests are too far-fetched to compromise. Instead, they split up; Britta and Pierce, an odd combination, have been talking nonstop about the birth of "good music" and head off towards the pulsating House of Blues. Jeff heads towards the middle section of Downtown Disney, entitled Pleasure Island, in search of alcohol, and Shirley and Annie, who want to make tonight memorable, go after him. Troy and Abed, of course, want nothing more than to experience "the most magnificent indoor virtual theme park ever" and head towards DisneyQuest.

DisneyQuest happens to be right beside the oddly-shaped Cirque du Soleil theater, so Troy and Abed don't walk far before they're immersed inside the indoor virtual theme park. DisneyQuest allows visitors to create and experience their own rides and this, in turn, makes it Troy and Abed's new heaven. They ride the small-scale virtual rides first; they battle pirates for buccaneer gold, plunge down a prehistoric river in the dinosaur age, battle super villains in a comic book world, and play through a life-sized pinball game, Mighty Ducks-style. Then, just when they think it can't get any better, they come upon CyberSpace Mountain.

"Welcome to CyberSpace Mountain!" Bill Nye the Science Guy, on the computer before them, greets excitedly. "I'm here to assist you with the laws of physics as your design your own roller coaster! Make it as timid or as scary as you want and when you're finished, take it for a spin yourself!"

"Abed," Troy says quietly. "I think we just died and went to heaven."

Abed nods slowly. "I don't think I've ever been happier."

CyberSpace Mountain allows visitors to create their own roller coaster by building the tracks and then testing it out in an M-16 flight simulator. Troy and Abed receive their boarding pass, swipe it, and then are provided with three options for the world they want their coaster to take place in. Troy asks, "Okay, do we want to fly through Land of Lava, The Ice Planet, or Astronomical… something, I can't read what that says."

"Lava, always lava," Abed decides, tapping that option as three new ones replaced them. "Choose your speed- Easy Does It, Lightning Fast, or Hang on for Your Life?"

"Hang on for Your Life!" Troy grins, choosing that option as the Thrill-O-Meter appears on the screen. "Ooh, look! We're a level five! The most thrilling!"

"Nice," Abed says and then hundreds of tracks fill the screen. "Okay. Let's get to work."

They add curves and dips, loops and corkscrews, inversions and accelerations. Each time they add a new track piece, they watch as it appears onscreen and a tiny roller coaster car speeds through their newly-designed track. It's absolutely thrilling and exciting and the two are having the time of their lives designing their ride. Finally, they finish their coaster with a huge dive through lava at the end and head up to the launch bay, handing their boarding pass to the navigator on deck. He swipes their card and says, "Land of Lava, a level five? That's daring! You'll be going upside down seven times. Does that work for you?"

"Always," Abed tells him and the guy chuckles.

"Alright, step right in," He opens the flight simulator to reveal two seats and straps them in. "Enjoy your ride."

They're enclosed in their simulator and everything's calm… but not for long. Soon, they're zooming through their tracks, feeling the heat of the lava even though it's pixilated and fake. The inversions make them feel as though they're falling out of their seats and each loop forces them upside down before righting them again, as if teasing their body's natural cycles. Though they're speeding through the virtual tracks at an _insane_ speed and the loops are churning their undigested dinners, Troy and Abed have grins the size of the Great Wall of China on their faces the entire time.

Meanwhile, Jeff, Annie, and Shirley had ended their extravagant night in a club by the name of Paradiso 37, a lively dance club with an extensive bar. They had first visited all of the shops and trinket stores Annie and Shirley had desired to stop at, including the LEGO store, the World of Disney, and Disney Days of Christmas, just to name a few. They stopped for ice cream in a little place outside Planet Hollywood, and when they'd entered Pleasure Island, the first thing Jeff had heard was the pulsing music emanating from the club before them, the very own Paradiso 37. Jeff had walked through the doors without even a look behind him to see if the girls had followed. It was an entire scotch later when he realized they had.

Shirley is sipping from a pomegranate margarita and Jeff from his second scotch of the night as they two watch Annie pore over the drink menu. "There are so many options… How do I pick one?"

"You don't know what you might like?" Jeff asks and Annie shakes her head vigorously. "Ah, right. You're newly-legal."

He reaches over the table and points towards the drink section. "I recommend the Long Island Iced Tea. It's good for beginners."

"Vodka, Gin, Rum, Tequila…!" Annie gasps, reading the description. "There's _so_ much alcohol in this!"

Jeff rolls his eyes and Shirley says, in a scolding tone, "She's a newbie, Jeff. Give her a break. Annie, you should order Colorado Skies. That's the first drink _I_ ever had and it's delicious!"

"Blue Curaçao, Tequila and Grapefruit Juice," Annie reads and then nods confidently. "Yeah, yeah I can do that."

A moment later, the baby blue drink is delivered and Jeff and Shirley watch her like a hawk as she takes her tentative first sip. She swallows and brightens. "This _is_ good! It's so sweet; you barely taste the alcohol!"

"That's my girl!" Shirley shrieks proudly and gives her a high five.

Jeff chuckles, too. "Welcome to the wonderful world of alcohol, Annie. You are officially an adult."

"Thanks!" Annie bounces excitedly, glancing around and taking in the night club atmosphere. "Wow, this is awesome. I mean, it's so _not_ me, but I can pretend for the sake of the vacation."

Shirley grins. "At least you're having fun, Annie. I'll be right back; I'm going to step out for a minute to call my boys. Watch my drink, will you?"

Annie nods and Shirley leaves their table, heading for the restaurant doors. The brunette takes a long sip of her drink and says, "So… How's life been?"

Jeff smirks, downs the rest of his drink, and responds, "Fine. Nothing's changed since we've been here."

Annie colors, remembering the day before, and replies, "Really? I don't think I can say the same."

"Really? Why not?" Jeff implores and Annie blushes even further.

"Well Abed… You know he's got a thing for movie references-"

"I'm aware of the concept, yeah," Jeff says sarcastically.

"-and yesterday while we were in Epcot, we went to Italy for lunch and we kind of reenacted that scene from _Lady and the Tramp_. You know, the spaghetti scene?" Annie tells him and when he nods his understanding, she continues. "And then we kind of… kissed. It was really, really nice… But I don't know what it means."

"It sounds like he likes you," Jeff tells her honestly. "I mean he went through all that trouble to reenact a major scene from a movie, an _animated_ movie no less, in a public place. Sounds like Abed's version of romance, to me."

Annie smiles, thinking of this, but then says, "You don't sound jealous."

It isn't an accusation, more of an observation, and Jeff laughs slightly. "I'm not."

And truth be told, he really isn't. It's something that shocks both of them, because everyone knows how awfully he took the news of Annie's past crush on Rich and ever further past relationship with Vaughn. But for some reason, Annie's crush- or maybe more? - on Abed doesn't bother Jeff in the slightest. It's then Jeff realizes that maybe he _wasn't_ jealous of Vaughn or Rich, but instead worried for Annie, because neither the doctor nor the hippie were right for her and he _knew_ that. But somehow, with Abed, things just seem to make sense and since he's already proven he can make her happy, Jeff has absolutely no qualms with this possible relationship.

Annie seems relieved by this admission, not saddened or envious, as she visibly relaxes and says, "Good. I'm glad."

"Yeah," Jeff says. "Well you should probably talk to him. You know, figure it out."

"I know. I should," Annie glances down, drumming her fingernails on the tabletop before looking back at Jeff. "But, um, you should too, you know. Figure things out."

Jeff stares at her and tries to pretend not to know what she's talking about, even though it's looming in the air around them. Shirley returns then but doesn't retake her seat, saying, "Okay, the boys are in bed, Andre apologized for saying my job's easy, the night is young and so are we! Let's dance!"

Annie shrieks her acceptance excitedly and the two head for the dance floor, pausing a moment to turn back and ask, "Jeff? Aren't you coming?"

"Dancing isn't really my thing," He insists. "You guys go ahead."

So they do and on the other side of the strip, near Cirque, are Britta and Pierce, inside the House of Blues where they'd unknowingly attended a concert performed by a lesser-known band named Smokin' Token. Afterwards, they'd shopped around inside the store, looking at memorabilia from different bands and singers, trying on ridiculous costumes, props, and hats, and marveling at the creepy-yet-awesome skeletons bedazzled with rhinestones, glitter, and paint. Finally, it's nearing ten p.m. and the store manager ushers them out so he can shut down production until the morning. On the way out, Pierce makes the fatal mistake of opening the door for Britta.

"I can open a door myself, Pierce," Britta tells him vehemently and Pierce frowns. "I know society has this view that women are physically incapable of doing things for themselves, but that doesn't mean I am going to conform to the societal norms."

"A simple 'thank you' would suffice," Pierce grunts under his breath.

Britta turns to him. "What did you say?"

"Do you ever get tired of being a cynical pain-in-the-ass?" Pierce asks and Britta scoffs, indignant. "No, really. Is it so wrong that my mother raised me with chivalrous intentions?"

"Chivalry is dead and belongs in the medieval ages," Britta responds.

Pierce sighs. "Maybe so, but I was just trying to help you out because I like you. You're my friend."

Britta stops walking, near speechless. "I like you, too, Pierce. I'm sorry. I… I didn't… I was just-"

"Look, I know you're becoming a therapist because you want to help people. I know you like to take care of people," Pierce says. "But maybe _you_ need to be taken care of, for a bit."

Britta stares at him. "What do you mean?"

"I think you know what I mean," Pierce winks at her. "I think I'm going to head back to the hotel. I'm exhausted. Annie says she, Shirley, and Jeff are at Paradiso 37 in Pleasure Island if you want to join them. Or you can always go with Troy and Ay-bed at that virtual what'cha-ma-call-it."

He takes off and leaves Britta standing in the middle of the street, thinking about what he'd just said. She considers it, for a while, before shaking her head and walking towards Pleasure Island, Paradiso 37 and alcohol the only things on her mind. On the way in, she passes Shirley and Annie, who both seem high on pleasure and tell her they're heading over to the tethered hot air balloon in the middle of the strip and that Jeff's still inside. She enters, spots him, and hits the bar first, ordering her usual vodka before joining him.

"Nice find," She says after taking a long sip of her drink. "I've missed vodka."

He laughs. "Yeah. Only took a week, but we finally got the party started."

She stares at him. "How many of those have you had?"

"Four," Jeff tells her, but holds up five fingers. "I'm not driving, who cares?"

"Yeah, but the storm's blown over and we're going to a park tomorrow," Britta informs him. "You want to do that hung-over?"

"Challenge accepted," He says and Britta rolls her eyes.

"Why are you getting drunk off your ass right now?" She asks point blank and he shrugs.

"I don't know, I'm trying to think," He replies. "I think better with scotch."

"I'm sure you do," She says sarcastically, polishing off her drink and beckoning for a new one. "Look, um, I want to talk about yesterday."

Jeff groans. "I don't. That's what I was thinking about."

"You were?" She asks incredulously. "Why?"

"I want to tell you a secret," He whispers and she has to lean closer to hear him over the pulsating music. "I was jealous of that Samir guy."

Britta rolls her eyes. "I know _that_. That's not a secret."

"I don't know why though," Jeff admits. "You make me feel weird."

"You make _me_ feel weird," Britta agrees. "Like yesterday, lunch was really nice. I mean, I'll forever love arguing with you and the back-and-forth we have is essential to keeping the balance but… I like when we can be civil, too. You are my best friend."

"Yeah, you're my best friend," Jeff says, watching Britta down another drink as she too begins to feel the alcohol's effect. "And I've never had one before so I don't want to screw that up, but they're still there."

"What's still there?" Britta asks drunkenly, both waiting for and dreading the answer.

"_Feelings_," Jeff tells her. "They're there. All over the place."

"Feelings," Britta repeats.

Jeff nods. "It's obnoxious, you know? Like a fluttering… or a buzzing… Or-"

But Jeff doesn't finish his sentence, because Britta leans over and kisses him and everything is lost in the moment. She, like always, doesn't want to deal with feelings, so she does the one thing she knows will shut him up and kisses him quite effectively. But everything they've been through, with their three tension-filled years at Greendale and their roller coaster of a relationship, is reflected in the kiss and it is, somehow, entirely different than the last time this happened (which, was in the janitor's closet after Shirley and Andre's remarriage, but don't tell anyone).

They're pried apart by the nagging hostess telling them to take their party elsewhere, so they toss a few bills on the table to pay for their drinks and leave the bar. Drunkenly, they stumble down the streets of Downtown Disney, arm in arm for balance, towards the bus stop, board the bus back to the resort, and take up the backseat making out. A harsh stop outside of the resort and a disapproving glare from the bus driver tells them they're home again and they stumble out again, entering the lobby and the elevator with one destination in mind. Jeff's room's closer to the elevator, so when they make it to the fourth floor with a loud ding, they're pressed up against his door as Jeff fumbles for the room key, and after denying them entry twice, they finally make it in.

And that's when they really take flight. Clothes discarded, bed sheets turned back, and the only light coming from the glittering stars and gleaming full moon shining through the unclosed curtains. He tells her she's beautiful and she doesn't believe him, but then she's never been good at taking compliments from anyone before. They come together as one as they had so many times previous to this one, and it's so cliché, but this time it feels different; maybe because they _make_ it different or maybe because they've changed. Either way, when it's over, breathing ragged and hair frazzled, they stare at each other and wonder just _what_ it is about them that makes it impossible for them to turn away.

If Walt Disney could see them now, Britta thinks just as she drifts off to sleep, he'd be spinning in his grave.


	8. Welcome to the Jungle

**Hi guys! I don't have to preface this chapter with an annoying rant about annoying reviews! Yay! Thank you so much to those of you who've been sticking with this story! Only two more chapters left :( It's sad, but I'll be back with more at some point haha. So yeah, I don't own anything, the italicized paragraph is from Animal Kingdom's website's video, blah blah blah. Enjoy enjoy!**

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Early Modern Fantasy

Chapter Eight: Welcome to the Jungle

"_Disney's Animal Kingdom park is a larger than life theme park with adventure at every turn! From the inspiring Tree of Life to the amazing Dinosaur! Disney Imagineers created fascinating attractions that mesmerize the whole family! Travel to Africa and glimpse animals up close on the wildlife safari! Thrill seekers will roar over the Yeti-guarded Expedition Everest and thundering Kali River Rapids! And children are always enchanted by the latest entertainment. Your entire clan will delight in all the spirited, animal-inspired shows! Flock to Disney's Animal Kingdom for all species of fun!_"

Waking up with a splitting headache on Friday, June 22nd is made much better by the fact that he's in a fancy Disney resort instead of a cheap motel and, he realizes, it is just the headache. He's had worse hangovers. Jeff's squinting in the sunlight, yawning and sitting up against the headboard of the bed as everything from the night before comes back to him. The sun is pouring through the open window, so the storm's passed thankfully, and he's remembering dinner at the Rainforest Café, shopping with Shirley and Annie, and drinks at Paradiso 37… His eyes widen as he realizes what happened after that. He turns beside him to find Britta, sound asleep, her tangled blonde curls splayed across the pillow.

"Oh shit," He says slowly and that alone awakens her.

She sits, rubs her eyes, and then stares at him. "Oh my God. What did we just do?"

Jeff yawns again. "We had sex."

"We had sex _on Disney property!_" Britta shrieks and Jeff winces. "We've tainted it!"

"Yeah," He deadpans and then stands, slipping on his underwear and heading for the kitchenette. "I'm going to make some coffee."

She stares at his retreating form, incredulous. "Do you not see how this is a huge deal?"

"Yes, I do," He calls behind him. "It's something I'd rather not deal with at seven thirty in the morning."

Britta contemplates this for a moment before redressing in last night's clothing, preparing for her walk of shame. "I'm going back to my room. I'll see you on the bus."

Jeff, who's prepared two cups of coffee, looks deflated. "You're not going to stay for coffee?"

She hesitates but ultimately shakes her head. "No I think it's best if I didn't."

"Yeah," He nods slowly. "Yeah, okay. I'll see you later."

Britta nods too and leaves and when later comes, they're just as awkward around each other as they were earlier that morning. They're the last two to the bus stop, having had to eat their breakfasts mighty quick, and Annie informs them giddily that they'll be going to Animal Kingdom that day, Troy handing each of them their t-shirt of the day- red with cheetah print font. It clashes, but they slip it over their heads anyway and board the bus, Britta sitting with Abed, much to Annie's dismay and Jeff sitting with Pierce, much to his own dismay.

Moments later, they arrive at Animal Kingdom, the largest of all Disney World parks, animal-lover Annie already excited. Animal Kingdom is home to more than 1,700 animals from over 250 species and houses them in over 500 acres of landscape akin to their various homelands. They depart the bus, present their park hopper passes, and enter the glorious animal-themed park, ready for another day of adventure. The park is divided into seven distinct areas- Oasis, Discovery Island, Camp Minnie-Mickey, Rafiki's Planet Watch, Dinoland U.S.A., Africa, and Asia. It's a large park and they have until seven p.m. to complete it, so they start immediately.

The first thing they do is head to Festival of the Lion King, per Annie and Shirley's request, in Camp Minnie-Mickey. It's a half hour of fun, dancing, and singing along with all of the Lion King characters as they get guests into the spirit with acrobatic gymnastics, spectacular singing and dancing, pageantry and puppetry, and colorful costumes. Troy, Annie, and Abed, oblivious to any kind of tension in the air, sing along gleefully and stand in their seats to stomp, clap, and dance along with the actors and puppets. However, during "Can You Feel the Love Tonight?" Jeff and Britta catch each other's eyes and glance away, glance down, thinking no one saw, but Shirley's much more intuitive than they believe.

As they're walking through Discovery Island towards Dinoland U.S.A., Britta hangs back in the group as Jeff takes the lead and pulls Shirley back with her. "Hey, can I talk to you for a second?"

"Of course," She smiles politely. "Is this about you and Jeffrey? You could cut the tension between the two of you with a knife!"

"Oh, you noticed, huh?" Britta sighs. "See something kind of… happened last night, after you and Annie left."

Shirley looks saddened. "Oh no. Did you two sleep together again?"

Britta's eyes widen. "Wow, you know us too well."

"Mother's intuition," Shirley winks. "What would you like me to do about it?"

"Well, I don't know. I need some advice because I don't know what to do," Britta confides and Shirley looks almost gleeful at the prospect of someone turning to her for help.

"I think you'll have to talk to Jeff about it," Shirley tells her gently. "How do you feel about it? I mean, what are your thoughts on the situation?"

"I guess I didn't really think about it," Britta shrugs. "I mean, it had to have happened for a reason, right? Lots of people get drunk and _don't_ sleep with their best friend. So… what does that mean?"

"What _does_ it mean?" Shirley asks her and Britta bites her lip, contemplative.

"It means," She says slowly, in realization. "I think I have feelings for him… I didn't see that coming and I don't know what to do."

Shirley smiles. "I did. From day one. And I know it seems like you're lost in what's going on, but you do need to talk to him, you know, to figure things out."

"No," Britta shakes her head, adamant. "I can't _tell_ him that! In case you haven't noticed, Jeff's not really big on feelings."

"Neither are you, but you just took a big step in confiding in me," Shirley informs her. "Now you need to take an even _bigger_ step in telling him."

"Yeah, I guess so," Britta says unconvinced. "Thanks, Shirley."

Shirley grins. "Anytime, Brit-ta."

Dinoland U.S.A. is home to all rides themed in the age when dinosaurs roamed the Earth, and Troy, Annie, and Abed, who encounter dinosaurs daily in the Dreamatorium, are super excited to experience these. The first thing they encounter, however, is TriceraTop Spin, which is basically the exact same ride as Dumbo but with dinosaurs, and not long after, Finding Nemo the Musical. Troy, Annie, Abed, and Shirley do it all, while Jeff and Britta, avoiding each other, head to Fossil Fun Games, the carnival-style arcade in the middle of the area to kill some time. The two walk in opposite directions and play their way around the games before meeting awkwardly in the middle, sharing a glance, and taking off in opposite directions once more.

When the other four depart TriceraTop Spin, all six of them decide to go on Primeval Whirl, a family-friendly rollercoaster with dips, curves, twists and turns that leave them unaware of the coaster's next move. Each turn made it seem as though they would fly off the edge of the track, giving Shirley more than one almost-heart attack. It's insanely daring, but Annie shrieks excitedly the whole time and Troy and Abed, still oblivious to any kind of tension looming in the air, seem to also be enjoying it. They stop for a quick lunch at the Restaurantosaurus before heading to the final attraction in Dinoland U.S.A. - the infamous Dinosaur.

They walk through the Dinosaur museum, with actual bones and fragments citing a time long since past. They're informed they're supposed to find the mysterious Iguanodon and bring it back to the present, and when they reach the front of the line and climb aboard the CTX Time Rover, Shirley is quick to redirect Troy, who goes to sit next to Britta in the middle after Abed and Annie take the front. "Um, actually Troy, would you mind sitting with me in the back? Maybe you can explain what an Iguanodon is supposed to be."

Troy shrugs and gets in beside her. "I have no clue. My only real experience with dinosaurs is watching Jurassic Park."

This forces Jeff to be the one to sit beside Britta, Shirley's intentions revealed. Jeff climbs in awkwardly and as the Time Rover begins its turbulent ride into the Cretaceous Era, he turns to her and says, "Looks like we're heading back to the year Pierce was born."

Britta laughs slightly. "Yeah, totally."

It's weird and it's definitely not _them_, but it's the most they've said to each other all day, so it's a start. Dinosaur turns out to be a frighteningly speedy jaunt through the darkened prehistoric forests of the Cretaceous Era, with gigantic animatronic dinosaurs jumping out at them and looking to eat them at every turn. They're actually surprised it's an attraction at the children's theme park, considering it's incredibly fast, in the dark, and has giant things with huge teeth appearing at every turn and curve. At the end of the ride, there's a giant flash, telling them the attendant took a picture, and when they review their photo at the ride kiosk, everyone looks as though they've just been properly terrified and tortured.

"Um guys," Annie asks nervously, pointing at their photo. "Where's Pierce?"

It's then that the rest of the group notices Pierce isn't with them and hadn't been with them for the entire duration of Dinoland U.S.A. Annie sends him a few text messages with no response and Abed calls him, but none of them get very far and decide to continue on into the park. It may seem selfish but if he wanted to throw another tantrum and disappear from the group, then he could rejoin them when he's ready. As they make their way back into Discovery Island, Jeff turns to allow Abed to take the lead and pulls Shirley aside.

"Listen Shirley," Jeff begins, his voice low. "I need some advice."

Shirley nods. "Sure. Anything."

"Last night, Britta and I kind of…" He trails off, not sure how to put it lightly.

Shirley saves him the trouble. "Slept together."

"Yeah… Wait, what?" Jeff looks shocked. "How'd you know?"

"I sensed it," Shirley lies. "Anyway, you need advice on what to do next?"

"Yeah," He repeats. "I need to know _why_ this keeps happening. I mean we slept together all last year and it wasn't an issue, but this year seems different. I feel like… I don't know. Something's changed."

"Wait, 'this year'?" Shirley asks. "I thought you two broke it off."

"We did," Jeff affirms. "It was just twice."

"Last night and when else?" Shirley asks, looking scandalized, but Jeff waves it off.

"That's not important right now," He shakes his head. "What matters is trying to figure out where to go from here, because… I'm kind of stuck."

Shirley smiles sympathetically. "Well I'd say you need to figure out what it is you're feeling and talk to Britta about it. If you don't, you're both going to end up hurt."

"I don't know _what_ I'm feeling, because I've never had this feeling before," He confides. "Plus, I'm not going to talk to Britta about it, she hates feelings. Actually, so do I. Let's pretend this never happened."

"Jeff, you can't avoid how you feel," Shirley sighs in frustration. "And you can't ignore feelings forever. At some point, you're going to have to address them so you can move on with your life."

"And if Britta doesn't feel the same?" Jeff asks quietly and Shirley has to bite her lip from telling Britta's secret.

"Well, it's a risk, Jeffrey. It's always going to be a risk," She tells him gently and it's clear that's not what he wanted to hear. "But you do what you've got to do. You tell her and even if she's not on the same page as you are, at least you'll _know_. It's much better than living your whole life wondering, 'What if?'."

"Yeah," Jeff sighs. "Thanks, Shirley. You just get me."

"Aw, pumpkin," Shirley coos but their conversation doesn't go any further because they reach the enormous Tree of Life and standing outside of the replica is Pierce.

"Pierce!" Troy shouts but he doesn't turn around. "We've been looking all over for you!"

"Yeah, I've texted you like a hundred times!" Annie shouts accusatorily. "Why didn't you answer?"

"It doesn't matter," Pierce says sadly. "You guys don't need me to have fun anyway. I'm too old."

"What are you talking about?" Britta asks. "We've been having fun all week."

"And why are you standing outside of this old tree?" Jeff probes. "We're wearing the brightest t-shirts in the entire park. You should've looked for us."

"It's the Tree of Life, Jeff," Pierce says in an obvious manner. "I thought if I stood out here long enough it might bring back some of my youth or at least add a few years on to my life so I don't feel so ancient around you guys."

"We don't think you're ancient," Shirley frowns but Pierce rolls his eyes.

"Please!" He exclaims. "You make fun of everything I do, you think I was born in the 20s, and I've never seen half of the movies they're referencing in these parks! I'm too old for Disney. I shouldn't have even come with you guys."

"Well then we could've flown," Abed points out, which makes Pierce even more upset.

"Abed," Annie warns, shaking her head, but it's Britta who takes the reins.

"Pierce," Britta begins sternly, forcing him to look at her. "You may be older than us, but you are _not_ too old for Disney. We need you here with us because when you're not, our group is incomplete. We literally cannot function without all seven of us being together. So saying you're unnecessary is ridiculous. You may have your moments, but we _all_ do. That's what makes us a family. No one's perfect."

"Britta's right," Jeff says and the latter smiles at him gratefully. "We need you here with us. Plus, there's no age on Disney. College kids come here on spring break, people have their honeymoons here, and some people have their fiftieth anniversary parties here. There's something about this place that attracts people of all ages for that exact reason- you're never too old to have fun. If anything, this should make you feel younger. It should bring back your youth, not remind you that you aren't in it anymore."

Pierce stares at the tree for a long time before nodding. "I _do_ feel a bit younger, now that you mention it."

"See," Britta says, glancing at the rest of the group members. "I _can_ be a good therapist."

"You gave a pretty good Winger speech yourself," Jeff tells her, impressed, and holds out his hand. "Up top!"

"You're such a loser," She responds, but gives him the high five anyway.

"Okay, now that we're all good, can we move on?" Annie asks impatiently. "The park closes at seven and it's almost three. We've still got half the park to go!"

"Of course," Shirley tells her, just glad Jeff and Britta put aside their differences for a moment to make Pierce feel better.

Inside the Tree of Life is an A Bug's Life-themed 3-D show, which is disappointing, they find, after they sit through it. This completes the attractions in Discovery Island, so the group heads over to Africa to take on Kilimanjaro Safaris Expedition. It's easily one of the most popular rides in the park and the wait time is thirty minutes, but the description on the park map sounds so spectacular, they're willing to wait. This particular attraction is around the same size as the entire Magic Kingdom park, showcasing how large the park itself is. When their half hour is up and they finally board the open-sided safari vehicle, Shirley again does everything she can to assure that Jeff and Britta sit together.

But once they're in the wide-open African savanna, they can see why this attraction is one of the most popular. Hundreds and hundreds of acres of wild land are home to species akin to those you'd see on a real safari and no one has much to say because they're too much in awe of what they're seeing. Zebras grazing in the grasslands, elephants making the trek across their trail, antelopes galloping along a beaten path, cheetahs speeding up and down rocks and so much more. They drive through a low pond, where hippopotamuses surface and sink on one side and crocodiles watch the safari vehicle closely as they drive through. On their way back through, a pack of lions crowded under a cave for shade greet them with a few wild roars, the baby lion cubs wrestling on the ground in play. A few feet from the ride's exit, they pause a moment so a family of giraffes can pass. For a moment, the group is sure they'd stepped out of Disney World and into the heart of Africa.

Finally, they cross into Asia around dinner time, stop for a quick dinner in one of the Asian-themed restaurants, and then off to their final two rides of the evening- Expedition Everest and Kali River Rapids. Pierce and Shirley are already complaining as they get in line for the first one, the former complaining of a heart problem and the latter complaining the ride's too intense for her. But the rest of the group says the ride will be perfectly fine as long as they don't make it a big deal. They're not convinced, especially as they pass through the buildings with all of the information, precautions, and sightings of the Yeti.

When they reach the front of the line, Abed grabs Annie's hand, who looks gleeful at the prospect, and sprints to the very front car. Troy looks seemingly hurt that his best friend didn't choose him, but has no qualms with sitting with Shirley behind the two. Pierce fumbles with everything and ends up sitting beside a perfect stranger, which, of course, leads Jeff and Britta to sit with each other. They're beginning to get suspicious of Shirley, who turns in her seat to give each of them a conspiratorial wink. But before they can accuse her of doing anything, the train gives a wail and away they go towards the top of Mount Everest.

"They did an amazing job with the scenery," Abed comments. "I've never been to Mount Everest, obviously, but I'd like to climb it, someday."

"I'm with you man," Troy says from behind his friend. "We'll take that mountain _down_."

"Ooh, I'll come too!" Annie pipes up from beside Abed, who seems to think this is a great idea. Troy looks somewhat disappointed.

The train is going along at a modest speed before going through a cave, where a mysterious shadow scurries across the rocks. Then, they continue on until finally, they can't go any further- the tracks are broken off. Shirley sounds nervous when she asks, "W-What happens now?"

"Now," Abed says in an Alfred Hitchcock-like voice. "We die."

The train idles for a moment, giving Britta enough time to turn to Jeff and ask, "Is there like a detour I should know about?"

Jeff's glancing around anxiously. "It doesn't look like it. I think-"

But before he can finish his sentence, the train is suddenly hurdling backwards, down the mountain, down through the cave, and speeding through the air. Annie is already shrieking from the front seat, covering her eyes and asking, "Where is he? Where's the Yeti?"

"Wait, he's not actually part of the ride, right?" Britta shouts back as they're ascending into the mountains again. "It's just a myth!"

But then the mountains turn dark as they're suddenly inside the cold, dark environs of Mount Everest. They here a low grumbling noise and then, right above the their train, is the giant animatronic Yeti, its gleaming yellow eyes glaring at the train's occupants and snarled teeth baring as it lets out a magnificent roar and swipes down towards the train. Just in time, they plunge down into the bowels of the mountains once more, screaming with terror and with delight as they round the snow-covered mountain and head back into the station, their journey over.

It isn't until their train has come to a complete stop and the lap bars are lifted that Jeff and Britta notice they're holding hands. Shirley notices, too.

"That was _amazing!_" Annie shrieks, bouncing excitedly. "I mean, the parts I saw, anyway. I had my eyes closed most of the time. But that Yeti? He looked so _real!_"

"I have to know how they made him so big in a space so small," Abed wonders aloud.

Pierce snorts. "Ha! That's what she said, right Troy?"

Troy chuckles and gives Pierce a high-five. "That was actually a good one."

"Okay," Jeff announces, clearing his throat and once again avoiding Britta. "So we only have about an hour until the park closes. One last ride to end the night?"

"We, um, we haven't done the River Rapids yet," Britta says softly. "And I think it's good we saved that for last. I heard you get really wet."

"That's what she-"

"Okay, we get it," Shirley scolds, glancing at Pierce disapprovingly. "Let's do it."

They do, in fact, get absolutely _soaked_. It's a twelve-passenger river raft ride through the jungle, with waterfalls, cannons, and streams- and of course the occasional splash from the side- to get every passenger completely waterlogged. When they exit the ride and coinciding with this, the park, they all look like drowned rats; clothing heavy and hanging, hair matted to their foreheads and necks, and shoes squishing as they head to the parking lot and towards the bus stop to catch a ride home. On the way there, Jeff hangs back and pulls Britta aside, Shirley trying, but failing, to seem nonchalant as she eavesdrops from a few feet away.

"Listen," He begins. "We've got to talk about what happened last night."

Britta sighs in relief. "Ugh, thank you. I've been thinking about it all day."

"I think we should just forget it ever happened," Jeff says cautiously, not believing a word he's saying. "It was just a crazy night of drinking."

"Yeah, we have those all the time," Britta nods along, agreeing although her mind's telling her otherwise. "It shouldn't have happened and it won't happen again."

"No, of course not," Jeff agrees. "It meant nothing."

"Yeah," Britta says. "Nothing."

"Great," Jeff smiles half-heartedly. "So we're good?"

"Always," Britta returns the smile just as half-assed and Shirley, from afar, looks absolutely devastated.

They board the bus and sit aisles away from one another. Shirley looks from one to the other, sure that there had been miscommunication _somewhere_. She looks absolutely and utterly disappointed.

But then again, so do Jeff and Britta.


	9. Polar Bear Plunge

**Hi friends! I have no idea why this chapter took me so long- it was so easy to write lol. It's the chapter before the last, guys! Only one more to go before the end. I'm kind of relieved, because this story was a lot of work and I got a lot of unwanted response from people thinking this story was something else, but at the same time, it was such a fun story to write and I'll definitely miss it. Anyway, thank you to those who've read and reviewed with positive constructive criticism and those who've stuck with me from the beginning! Enjoy Blizzard Beach!**

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Early Modern Fantasy

Chapter Nine: Polar Bear Plunge

"_Talk about cool- after a freak snow storm, Florida's first ski resort was built. But when the snow melted, it became Disney's Blizzard Beach water park! Where you can slide twelve-stories down from towering Mount Gushmore! There's so much to do- ride a chairlift for a broad view of all the splashy fun and to reach the mountain's peak. Challenge your family to a carefree race down the toboggan slopes! Take a rumbling raft ride down the mountain! And while thrill seekers are riding the slopes, kids can frolic at their own attractions, with even tinier tots enjoying slides just for them! Don't miss the splash fest at Disney's Blizzard Beach!_"

They'd made it to the weekend and with it, the end of their vacation. On Saturday June 23rd, the group woke eager but also melancholy, knowing they only had two more days in Disney before their long, three-day trek home. At breakfast that morning, with Jeff and Britta sitting at opposite ends of the table and Shirley glancing between the two and shaking her head in remorse and frustration, the group had chosen to go to Blizzard Beach that day, the second and larger of the two Disney water parks, and thankfully, it looked to be a pretty sunny and hot day. Dressed in their swimwear and their t-shirt of the day- baby blue with white, frosty writing- they set off into the already burning morning sun and on the bus to Blizzard Beach.

Blizzard Beach is certainly larger than Typhoon Lagoon and doesn't leave all the extra space for decoration. The water park is packed with thrills and tons of options for adrenaline pumping fun or calm and serene relaxation. In addition to the wide wave pool, toboggan-style racing slides, and family-style raft flume, Blizzard Beach is also home to one of the world's fastest and tallest free-falling water slide in which the rider plummets down twelve stories of nonstop speed and water. It is easily going to be another day of wet adventure for everyone and once they're inside the park, they're quick to separate and eager to get started.

Being two of the people who had made the most out of Typhoon Lagoon, Britta and Annie are content to just take this day much slower and easier than the few before. Shirley had boasted to both of them about the wonders of relaxing by the pool and the two believe that nothing sounded better after their full week of nonstop action. So, as the group breaks into even smaller groups, Britta and Annie, an unlikely pair, begin to stroll along the park and manage to make a full lap around before deciding to laze in Melt-Away Bay, Blizzard Beach's very own wave pool.

They're both wading in the water, clad in bikinis- Annie's a majestic purple with white trim, Britta's a deep blue to break gender rules- and thinking about how relaxing it really is. They aren't in the middle of the pool, but only knee deep, so by the time the waves reach them, they're small and rolling and gentle. They attract a few stares and catcalls from the small group of seventeen, maybe eighteen, nineteen's-probably-pushing-it-year-olds across the way, and both turn up their noses in disgust. Britta calls back, "Yeah. We're in bathing suits. That doesn't make us pieces of meat!"

"Ugh, and what are they, twelve?" Annie replies. "Gross. Boys are annoying."

"I hear you," Britta sighs, shaking her head. "Some things never change."

Annie nods her agreement, adding, "I'm so glad we're hanging out today, Britta! We can actually have real girl time that doesn't involve me wrestling your cell phone away."

Britta chuckles a bit. "Yeah… Let's just pretend that whole night never happened. I'm not really good at girl time, though. How does it work?"

"We just talk about whatever- music, boys, clothes. Oh my God! This'll be so much fun! I haven't had girl time since middle school!" At Britta's confused look, Annie adds, "By high school, I had the whole pill addiction thing and I didn't really have any friends."

"Okay," Britta says slowly, not sure how to respond. "Let's talk about what's going on with you and Abed lately. You guys have been attached at the hip since day one."

"What? No!" Annie gasps, but colors immensely. "Okay, yeah, I guess so. I don't know what's going on, you know? Things happen and I think we're going somewhere, but then… he never brings it up again. He'll keep hinting at it forever, but…"

"Oh Annie, come on!" Britta begins. "You are a strong and independent woman and you don't need Abed to wait around for Abed to get his act together. You make the first move! Take control!"

"I guess I should," Annie shrugs, swirling a hand through the water. "I don't know, though. I've never made the first move with anyone. You know I had that crush on Troy forever and I never even told him how I felt… Hey, speaking of Troy-"

"I know what you're going to ask," Britta rolls her eyes. "And it's nothing, believe me. We hung out a few times but… He's not my type. Anyway, we're talking about you, remember?"

"Yeah," Annie smiles. "I don't know. I never saw this whole thing with me and Abed coming, but… He just _gets_ me, you know? We just understand each other. There's something about him that just makes me feel all tingly inside."

Britta frowns, recalling the conversation she'd had a few nights ago with Jeff. "Yeah. Yeah, I know what you mean."

"Want to hit the lazy river now?" Annie asks and when Britta nods her agreement, they two head over to Cross Country Creek. "Anyway, I guess I'll figure it out. We'll have to talk about it, right?"

"Yeah," Britta sighs, choosing a tube for herself and for Annie. "Sounds like a plan."

Annie eyes her suspiciously as they settle into the river, each holding onto the other's rubber tube handle so they didn't drift apart. "So what's been going on with you and Jeff? Shirley said there were all kinds of tension yesterday. I didn't really notice it, but you guys have been acting weird all vacation."

"Yeah, me and Jeff," Britta shakes her head. "I wish I knew. We're just… Not on the same page, right now."

"Really? I think you kind of are," Annie tells her and Britta gives her a look. "No, I really do. That's the thing about you two. You've _always_ been on the same page. The whole cynical, sarcastic, argumentative thing? I mean you guys have always just been one hundred percent with all of that, but with an actual relationship? It seems like you guys just can't figure it out."

"That's because we _can't_," Britta replies. "I mean the closest we've ever been was last year with the whole having sex behind everyone's backs thing…"

"I still don't know how you guys snuck that by us," Annie chuckles. "Or why I never suspected anything."

"Me either," Britta smiles. "But I don't know. It's never worked. Things just… get in the way."

"Oh my gosh, you probably mean me!" Annie exclaims, horrified. "Please don't let me be the problem! I swear, I'm over this whole triangle."

"I wasn't talking about you," Britta tells her even though she's still wondering where Annie stands with her feelings for Jeff.

"No but seriously," Annie shakes her head. "I really am over Jeff. I thought something would have happened this year, but… Anyway, it's done. I'm not going to object at your wedding, or anything. Don't worry."

"Whoa there, you're really getting ahead of yourself," Britta stammers. "I hardly think we're even going to figure out what's going on between us much less get _married_, for God's sake."

"Are you sure? You can't picture it?" Annie implores, getting a dreamy look in her eyes. "A proposal in front of Cinderella's Castle during fireworks, a calm ceremony on the beach, the first family vacation where you sit your two kids down in front of Walt's statue and tell them all about the time mommy and daddy fell in love over drinks at Paradiso 37…."

"Every girl's dream," Britta says and the two laugh.

"I'm serious," Annie grins. "Have you two talked it out at all?"

"We figured it out yesterday," Britta lies. "He doesn't want a relationship, so we just decided to move on."

"Did he actually _say_ he didn't want a relationship?"

"Well, no, but it's _Jeff_. I thought that's what he wanted."

Annie rolls her eyes. "Britta, he probably thought that's what _you_ wanted! Ugh, you two are so messed up."

Britta thinks for a moment and realizes that the spirited brunette actually has a point. If there's one thing that's painfully clear about Jeff, it's that he values his friendship with her above all else. Valentine's Day that first year at Greendale had proven that, with the lengths he'd go to restore the balance in their relationship knew no bounds. If Jeff had believed Britta did not want a relationship, he'd probably ignore his own feelings to make sure their relationship wouldn't be completely out of whack. The last thing he'd want is for there to be any sense of awkwardness, because that's when things go truly wrong.

Britta hesitates, contemplative, before groaning, "_Why_ are you always right?"

Annie giggles. "It's a natural talent, I'm afraid."

The two continue to float around the park, sharing girl time in their heart-to-heart as children shriek with laughter and their parents watch their little ones have fun. Meanwhile, on the other side of the park, Troy and Abed are taking on the thrill slides and have chosen to take Shirley under their wing, who had been pleading that morning for them to leave her to her book on a lounge chair in the sun. They'd refused, citing that her entire life had been watching from the sidelines and that she needed to enjoy herself that day.

At that moment in time, they are departing the slide entitled Runoff Rapids, a careening waterslide that takes them around twists and turns and ends up with them splashing into the lukewarm waters below. Shirley complains the ride is too speedy, but Troy and Abed had loved every second of it and after a quick lunch at Avalunch ("Clever," Abed comments and Shirley gives the traditional, "Ooh, that's nice!"), the three head over to the Downhill Double Dipper, a steep racing slide that leaves Shirley shrieking, but actually enjoying herself. She speeds past Abed, and when Troy emerges later, racing a stranger, she's quick to cheer him on.

On their way to the next slide entitled Snow Stormers, Shirley says, "This is actually pretty fun! I can't wait until Ben's older so we can take the boys!"

"Did you and Andre make up?" Troy asks and Shirley nods happily.

"When I called to say goodnight to the boys on Thursday night, he got on the phone and apologized," Shirley explains as they move along with the line. "Saying my job's easy did make me mad, but it's nothing compared to leaving me for a stripper."

"I thought you forgave him," Abed points out. "Isn't that why you remarried him?"

"Of course I forgave him," Shirley says. "I just can't forget."

Abed and Troy nod, believing this to be reasonable, and the three prepare to race down the curvy mountain paths. They obtain toboggan-style mats, lie down on their stomachs, and push off down the mountain, zooming through the ski-like gates on the switchback, slalom-style racing slides. Shirley's on the left-most slide, careening around twists and turns and through the final finishing gate, where she lands in the pool with a splash. Sputtering, she stands and grabs the mat just in time for Abed to follow her and then, a beat later, Troy does, too. She claps excitedly as the three exit the pool and shouts, "Ooh! I think I won!"

"I would guess so!" Troy laughs. "It was a close race, but you definitely took the win."

"Rematch?" Abed challenges, pointing towards the next attraction. "I say we take on the Toboggan Racers."

"Okay! You're on!" Shirley agrees and they keep their purple, toboggan-style mats and head back up the hill towards the line.

It doesn't take them long to reach the front of the line and when they get there they realize why. The Toboggan Racers waterslide is an eight-lane racing attraction and therefore, the more people they can get down the slide, the faster the line moves. Troy, Shirley, and Abed position themselves on their stomachs once more and when the attendant blows the whistle, they are sent speeding down the raceway in their lanes, competing for the win. This slide's all based on body weight, so the child on the far right wins by far. But, of the three from the Greendale Seven, Shirley still beats the two, proving that age is no factor in determining who wins a waterslide race.

As the three leave the Toboggan Racers and get in line for the Chairlift that will take them to the top of Mount Gushmore, towards their next attraction, the Slush Gusher, they pass Pierce, who is just returning from Polar Pub with two cold beers. He waves, gives Troy a high five, and then continues on, towards the wave pool, where he and Jeff are lounging, enjoying the sunny weather and the sounds of the lapping faux shore. Jeff and Pierce, an even unlikelier pair than Annie and Britta, are actually- shockingly- getting along and Pierce hands Jeff a beer before sitting back down beside him, sighing in satisfaction.

"Well, this is the life, isn't it Jeffrey?" He says and Jeff sips his beer, nodding. "I'll tell you, I can't even remember the last time I drank a beer by the beach. It's just relaxing."

"Yeah," Jeff agrees. "I'll definitely take it. Beats sweating to death in my apartment in Colorado, that's for sure."

"I'll be honest, I assumed I'd feel out of place at a children's park when I'm clearly not a child anymore," Pierce admits. "But I think what you and Brittles told me yesterday really helped. It's helped me get my youth back, just like she said. She's going to be a good therapist, you know."

"Yeah," Jeff smiles. "She certainly is."

"So I heard you two shacked up again," Pierce says and Jeff winces. "Good for you. You're young. Get it out of your system now, believe me. It only gets harder when you're older."

"Please don't tell me you're going to give me relationship advice," Jeff grimaces. "And how did you know about me and Britta anyway?"

"Please, it's all over Disney World," Pierce chuckles. "And I don't care; I'm giving you advice whether you like it or not."

"How can you give me relationship advice when you've been married _seven_ times?" Jeff questions. "You're not exactly Mr. Relationship Expert."

"Exactly, I've been married seven times and that's why I _don't_ want it to happen to you," Pierce says. "I don't want you to make the same mistakes I did and sometimes you remind me of myself."

"Ouch," Jeff says sarcastically. "What did I do to deserve that?"

"I'm going to ignore that," Pierce tells him and continues. "When I married my first wife, I had it all planned out- a steady job, kids, a summer home on a beach somewhere that we'd retire in, later. But the moist towelette industry is brutal and traveling left me away from my wife for weeks at a time until our marriage suffered and I ended up cheating on her with a business associate. I'd never planned on doing that, Jeff, but once I did, I could never go back to where I was with my wife. Our marriage ended and all my dreams, all those plans I'd made, fizzled and flew right out the window. The next six marriages, I tried to find in them what I'd found in my first wife, but I never did. I never felt the same about any of them. Do you see where I'm going with this?"

"Do _you_ see where you're going with this?" Jeff asks and Pierce frowns.

"I'm saying that I had it _good_ with my first wife, Jeff," Pierce says. "We were happy and in love and that's all we needed. But I was stupid. I didn't communicate with her what I wanted and ended up doing something that I completely regretted and losing her forever. Don't follow in my footsteps, Jeff. Don't be stupid."

"Look, I know everyone's trying to paint Britta and me as these saintly people who just can't seem to work it out," Jeff begins uneasily. "But maybe it's because we _shouldn't_ work it out. I don't think we're 'meant to be,' or whatever."

"Jeff, I have never met two people so similar in my life," Pierce comments. "And I've met _a lot_ of people."

"Opposites attract, same repel," Jeff replies weakly and Pierce frowns once more.

"In _magnets_," He says in an obvious manner. "People aren't robots, Jeffrey, and if you think they are, you've been spending too much time with Troy and Ay-bed."

Jeff's silent a while before saying, "Look, I'm not denying I have feelings for Britta, Pierce. I'm just saying that Britta and I are too complicated to figure things out."

"That's preposterous!" Pierce exclaims. "It's a ten-minute conversation, at best. You're emotionally damaged from your father, she's emotionally damaged from some asshole ex-boyfriend, you both promise to help each other through your issues and viola. Problems are solved and everyone's happy."

"I'm sure Britta's problems stem from much more than that douche from the carnival," Jeff says. "But thanks for trying to fix us."

Pierce shrugs. "Someone's got to give you the push. You're obviously not doing it for yourself. I mean, it's been three years since you first started your obsession with the girl whose name is also a brand of water filter."

"It's not an obsession," Jeff defends, but then hesitates to think. "But you're right. I can't believe I'm saying that, but you are. Do you think, if we figure things out and everything goes smoothly, that we won't end up like you?"

"You won't," Pierce guarantees him. "Because you know how to prevent that from happening."

Jeff smiles and nods, just as he gets a text from none other than Britta. It's simple; just explaining that the seven of them are heading to Teamboat Springs for the family-style raft ride, but still Jeff reads the message over and over before he thinks of a way to respond. He and Pierce head towards the slide, with Jeff thinking of nothing but Pierce's words of wisdom the entire way. What if he and Britta _did_ work things out? What if, when he told her how he was feeling, she completely rejected him? What if he did nothing at all and lost her down the road? Surprisingly, a sickening feeling develops in the pit of his stomach as this thought comes to him and he quickly shakes it out.

They all meet up at the opening of the line for Teamboat Springs and take the family-style raft down the twists and turns of the chilly flume. The sun is setting in the mid-evening sky as, waterlogged, the exit Teamboat Springs and decide to have a late dinner at Lottawatta Lodge. Abed mentions the iconic flume ride of Blizzard Beach, the Summit Plummet, and both Pierce and Shirley protest, so the other five decide to make this their final flume of the evening. They ride the Chairlift to the top of Mount Gushmore and wait in line for Summit Plummet, the twelve-story, 120-foot slide that propels riders down an almost-vertical slide in an alluded freefall.

Troy volunteers to go first, steps into the slide, and screams the entire way the down. Abed steps in next and when the attendant gives him the okay, signaling that Troy's left the slide, Abed salutes Jeff and Britta, winks at Annie, and drops down the twelve-story flume. Annie excitedly bounces on the balls of her feet and then steps into the water, crossing her arms over her chest and crossing her ankles, as directed. She buzzes nervously, shoots and anxious glance back at Jeff and Britta, and shrieks as she slides down 120 feet. Britta's next and when the attendant motions for her to lie on her back and cross her arms and ankles, she does so hesitantly.

The attendant glances at the bottom of the slide, watches Annie depart safely, and turns back to Britta, asking, "Are you ready to take the plunge?"

Britta glances back at Jeff, who gives her an encouraging smile, and nods. "Yeah. I think I am."

He lifts the bar, gives her the okay, and says, "No turning back now!"

She's immediately agreeing when she pushes herself over the edge. There's a moment when she's sure her body's lost contact with the slide and she begins to scream in pure terror before realizing she was still gliding safely down the long flume. The water pours into her suit, her crossed limbs, and her eyes but she reaches the bottom in mere seconds and is provided with her ride speed- a shocking sixty-five miles per hour. Britta sits, gets off of the slide, and adjusts her twisted and mangled bathing suit, turning to wait with her friends and watch as Jeff, too, takes the plunge.

The irony is not lost on either of them- if they're willing to plunge down a twelve-story waterslide, they're ready to figuratively take the plunge in their relationship.


	10. Where Dreams Come True

**So this is it, friends! We've reached the end! I finished this chapter at 12:35 a.m. this morning, or so my Word document tells me, so that tells you how obsessive I am haha. I had to finish this! This one was probably the most fun chapter, even though I've been saying that about all of them from the beginning. But whatever guys. It's enjoyable haha. So their time in Disney has come to an end, as has this story, so enjoy and as Mickey says, see ya real soon!**

* * *

Early Modern Fantasy

Chapter Ten: Where Dreams Come True

"_Come to the legendary place where dreams come true! Full of classic Disney entertainment and attractions, Magic Kingdom park is where fantasy really is reality! Experience the incredible imagination of Disney Imagineers all around you and in every moment. Get lost in the whimsy of fairytales! Conquer mountains with fellow thrill seekers! Watch kids of all ages get wide-eyed as they meet movie heroes and beloved Disney characters. Discover you're a Disney pirate or princess at heart! Here, every magical day has an enchanting end!_"

Sunday June 24th marks their final day in Disney and what better way to end their vacation than with the sixth and final Disney park- Magic Kingdom. Their t-shirt of the day, which Jeff, Pierce, and Britta immediately complain about, is a majestic pink with golden storybook font, signifying the fairytale theme for the day. Everyone is upset by the fact that it's their last day of the magnificent vacation, but they're determined to make the most of Magic Kingdom and all of the opportunities it has in store for them.

Magic Kingdom is, by far, the most majestic and popular of the Disney World theme parks. It may be the smallest, but it is packed with magic at every turn, whether it's in the classic rides, the amazing shows, or the endless parades of excitement and youth. Magic Kingdom boasts the colorful characters and princesses people of all ages love and there are endless opportunities to meet them throughout the day. The moment the seven are through the great iron gates, they're immersed in the whimsical magic of childhood once more.

The park is divided into seven separate neighborhoods- Main Street U.S.A., Adventureland, Frontierland, Liberty Square, Mickey's Toontown Fair, Tomorrowland, and Fantasyland. They're in no real hurry to finish the park, since finishing it means the end of the vacation, and since Magic Kingdom is open until ten p.m., they have plenty of time to get through it. Walking down Main Street U.S.A., there is a familiar sense of coming home. The next sight they see is Cinderella's Castle, the most majestic and realistic depiction of a fairytale in all the land, but hundreds of feet before it, a group of children and their parents are gathered.

Upon closer inspection, they see it's because Mickey and Minnie Mouse are doing a meet and greet right outside the castle. Shirley coos over the children, "Aw, they're so little and cute! Look how excited they are! This really makes me miss my boys."

"Guys, we should go wait in line!" Annie suggests. "We have to get a picture with Mickey and Minnie, and what better place to get it than in front of the castle!"

"Yeah, it'll complete our photo ops!" Troy agrees. "We got one in front of the Fantasia hat at Hollywood Studios, the crystal ball thing at Epcot, and the Tree of Life at Animal Kingdom, so we'll obviously need one here!"

The parents of the children meeting Mickey and Minnie give the group odd glances, mainly because the seven adults have no children with them, but when their turn comes, they crowd around Minnie and Mickey without a care. Annie gives one of the parents her camera and after a few snapshots, they have the perfect photo. She promises to print seven copies of each of their group photos so every member can have tangible evidence of their dream vacation. Following the photo, they thank Mickey and Minnie, as well as the mother who took the picture, and head deeper into the park.

Upon entering Adventureland, they find a few attractions that tickle their fancy. They ride the zany riverboat Jungle Cruise and climb high into the treetops in the Swiss Family Robinson Treehouse before passing a large golden camel and knowing they're in Arabia. Abed and Annie are immediately excited. "We absolutely _have_ to go on the Magic Carpets of Aladdin! It's such a kid's ride, but it's magical!"

"Yeah, I'll pass," Jeff negates and heads in a different direction. "I'm not one for kiddie rides."

"Me either," Britta refuses. "But enjoy."

As the others board their flying carpets for a magical flight over Agrabah, Jeff and Britta, with some awkward tension, head towards a nearby market stand. Jeff says, "Not really in the mood to discover a whole new world."

"It's a cute movie, but the ride's for kids," Britta agrees. "Well, actually, they're all pretty much for kids, so we're going to have to get over this."

"Yeah, that's probably true." Jeff sighs. "So… Did you have a good day yesterday?"

Britta scrunches her nose. "Ugh, we're making small talk? When are we going to get back to normal?"

"I don't know, everything's weird," Jeff frowns. "Can we just…?"

"Yeah," Britta smiles, reaching over towards a Mickey paraphernalia stand and grabbing one of the iconic Mickey ears hats. "Only if you wear one of these hats."

She places the hat on his head and he gives her a look. "Sure, why not? Pink shirt, Mickey ear hat. If Alan and the rest of the guys could see me now…"

Britta laughs. "I think you look fantastic."

Jeff eyes her and finds a hat in the midst with Minnie's bow in between the two ears, placing it atop her own head. "There. So do you."

She returns the look. "Oh, you want to do this? Because I'll do this."

"Oh I want to do this," Jeff nods, paying for both hats as the two head back towards the flying carpets from Aladdin. "I'll bet you anything I can keep this hat on longer than you can, despite looks and questions from the group and random strangers."

"Oh please!" Britta disagrees. "You're completely obsessed with your looks and will take it off in five minutes. I'm totally going to win. I don't care what the group says."

"It's on." Jeff says and Britta nods.

Moments later, the other five return from their flight and give Jeff and Britta the oddest of stares. Annie asks, "What's with the ears?"

They ignore her and keep walking towards Pirates of the Caribbean, Britta murmuring, "I'm going to wear this longer than you."

Jeff shakes his head, whispering, "I'm _so_ going to wear this longer than you are."

Pierce turns to Annie and tells her, "Forget it. It's another one of their gay competitions."

Pirates of the Caribbean turns out to be much more exciting adventure than they'd expected, especially after the fourteen-foot drop at the very beginning that has Britta and Jeff scrambling to hold onto their Mickey ears. They're soon immersed in the middle of a pirate battle, with swashbuckling buccaneers pillaging the town and Captain Barbossa asking a shrimpy skipper if he'd seen Captain Jack Sparrow. They're so caught up in the classic tale of the pirates and the cannons exploding that they don't even notice that the end of the ride is near, all the pirates joining in a round of drinks and a chorus of "Yo-Ho Yo-Ho a Pirate's Life for Me!"

Soon, Adventureland bleeds into Frontierland, which houses the Walt Disney Railroad, a few children's shows, and two of the three iconic mountains. They decide to bypass the train and the shows and instead head straight for the two thrill rides. The first mountain they decide to conquer for the day is Splash Mountain, and thankfully, the line isn't too long yet. They're floating around the mountain; ascending and falling over small hills as the inside of the caves tell the story of Br'er Rabbit, Br'er Fox, and Br'er Bear. Pierce comments on how his mother used to read him stories of this iconic trio just as Troy and Annie express that they've never heard of them.

"I hope we don't get too wet," Shirley says. "It's only eleven-thirty. I'd hate to be soaked for the rest of the day."

"I don't think it'll be too bad," Britta tells her. "Besides, even if we do, it's so hot and sunny, we'll be dry in no time."

"Wait, we get wet on this ride?" Pierce questions. "When? No one told me this!"

"I don't know when, but I'm assuming it's when we go down the five-story drop," Jeff tells him sarcastically and, if possible, Pierce looks even more panicked.

"Five-story drop?" Pierce gasps. "I can't do drops! I have a condition!"

"Please don't fake a heart attack again," Troy deadpans. "You're fine."

And before he can protest, they ascend the largest hill yet and a flash goes off just as their flume goes over the mountain and down the fifty-foot drop. Pierce screams like a little girl and clutches his chest, but the moment their log is horizontal again, he's perfectly fine. Jeff and Britta, furiously clutching their Mickey/Minnie ears, barely get wet at all, but Troy and Abed, sitting in the front, get nearly soaked. They shake it off, review their photo, decide it's awful and not to buy it, and head next door to the second mountain adventure- Big Thunder Mountain Railroad.

But don't let the name fool you- Big Thunder Mountain Railroad isn't your average measly train ride. It's a mild yet wild rollercoaster up and around the gold-mining town of Tumbleweed. Their ride attendant makes sure all lap bars are secure before warning them, "Hang on to your hats and glasses 'cause this here's the wildest ride in the wilderness!" Jeff and Britta groan and attach their hands to their heads once more, Annie and Shirley giggling at their foolishness. But not only is it an enjoyable ride, it offers some fantastic views of the park and the close attention to detail on the old dried up western town. Pierce, still, screams like a little girl.

Following their thrilling ride on Big Thunder Mountain, the group heads into Liberty Square for lunch at Liberty Tree Tavern. Once everyone's ordered and their drinks have been delivered, Abed, who's sitting beside Annie, takes the latter's hand and announces, "Annie and I have something to tell you guys."

"I took your advice, Britta, and I just went for it," Annie squeals excitedly. "Abed and I are kind of a couple now!"

"This is the real deal," Abed grins, squeezing her hand for effect and Shirley makes and awing sound.

"Oh yay!" She claps excitedly. "I'm so happy for you two!"

"Me too!" Britta agrees. "See I told you if you took charge, everything would work out!"

"Congratulations," Jeff smiles genuinely and lifts his glass in a toast. "To the happy couple."

They clink their glasses together just as Pierce comments, "You two crazy kids deserve each other! Well done, Ay-bed, you'll finally get to nail her!"

Shirley groans. "Ugh, Pierce! Way to ruin the moment!"

But Annie and Abed ignore Pierce's comment and instead turn to Troy, who manages to look both excited for them and a bit sad for himself. Annie questions, "This isn't going to be weird for you, is it?"

"Well a little bit, yeah," Troy admits. "But I'm glad you two are happy. Even if I am going to be like the third wheel, now."

"No, we'd never make you feel that way," Annie promises and Abed nods along.

"It'll be just like before," Abed assures his best friend. "Only now I get to kiss Annie whenever I want."

Annie blushes and nods and Troy chuckles. "Sure, man. Whatever you say."

"I'm so glad everyone's getting together and ironing things out!" Shirley says pointedly, staring directly at Jeff and Britta, who avoid her eyes. "Isn't it great?"

"Wonderful," Britta says quietly.

"Fantastic," Jeff adds.

Their food arrives, they dine, and couple talk is no longer a bit of subject matter at the table, much to Jeff and Britta's relief. Following their lunch, they take a short ride on the Liberty Square Riverboat and sit through the Hall of Presidents show as they watch the animatronic presidents tell about their greatest achievements in a snore-fest of a show. It's here that Jeff recalls the last time he had been here, the time he'd gotten so drunk he'd gotten into a fight with Ben Franklin, and grimaces while Britta, the only one he'd told about this, chuckles beside him. He shoots her a look the moment Troy asks her what's so funny and she covers smoothly, telling him Obama's plans for the future seem ridiculous to her and that she still stands beside her point that citizens need not be governed. Jeff rolls his eyes and says, "Nice save."

"Whatever, I did it so _you_ wouldn't be embarrassed, not me," Britta whispers back. "Also, that kid behind you can't see over your hat. Want to take it off?"

"Yeah sure," He begins and then remembers their game. "Oh nice try. I almost fell for that."

She smirks. "It was worth a shot."

When the Hall of Presidents lets out, they head next door to the park's famed ride, the Haunted Mansion. They enter the attic and suddenly realize they're in a room with no doors and no windows. Spooky much? Jeff and Britta are once again forced to sit together in their doom buggy by Shirley, who winks conspiratorially at them and sits beside Troy. It's a magical journey through an eerie house, with dancing ghosts, floating heads, and jolly headless huntsmen who volunteer to follow them home. Britta shivers and Jeff shoots her a questioning look.

"You alright?"

"I don't like ghosts," She tells him in a 'You better not make fun of me' tone. "Ghosts, ghouls, demons, anything to do with the paranormal just… freaks me out."

"Britta, it's a _children's_ ride," Jeff teases. "I mean seriously. They're just holograms created by projectors. That's all it is."

"I don't care! It's still freaky!" She insists, just as their doom buggy turns to the side to face a mirror, showing a plump and joyous little ghost sitting right in between Jeff and Britta. She groans and says, "Why would they do this to kids? Why would they freak them out like this?"

"I can't believe that you were tear gassed at a World Trade rally," Jeff chuckles. "And yet you're afraid of _ghosts_."

"Shut up," She warns him, but it's just an empty threat as the ride ends and they depart Liberty Square.

Main Street U.S.A. is packed and crowded with people waiting to see the daily parade, so instead of moving directly into Fantasyland, which was blocked from view, the group takes the long way around park until they end up in Mickey's Toontown Fair. Completing this section of the park takes mere minutes, as most of the attractions are geared towards children, and then they are finally heading into one of the most exciting sections of Magic Kingdom- Tomorrowland. Hosting the final and the wildest of three mountain rides, Space Mountain, as well as many other futuristic rides, the group is eager to begin.

Their experiences can only be described as magical as they make their way from the Tomorrowland Indy Speedway, a mini race car ride, to the Astro Orbiter, an outdoor rocket ride through the cosmos. They take a scenic ride through the park on the Tomorrowland Transit Authority, a fancy name for the monorail, and watch American life transform from pioneers to Jetson-like living in the Carousel of Progress. They're transported back to their youth on Buzz Lightyear's Space Ranger Spin and Stitch's Great Escape, but the real thrills come from everyone's favorite, Space Mountain.

Once they board the sleek spaceship- Jeff, Shirley, Britta, and Pierce in one and Troy, Annie, Abed, and a stranger in another- they're off, blasting through space and time at thrillingly high speeds. Pierce is once again shrieking like a girl and Shirley is shouting, "Oh my Lord, oh my Lord! No one told me it was going to be this fast!"

"It only goes twenty-eight miles per hour," Jeff calls back. "But feels a lot faster in the dark."

"Thanks Abed," Britta teases him. "I'm so glad we now know all of that useless information."

"This ride's actually pretty great!" Annie screams from behind. "I just wish I knew where we were going!"

"It's in the dark for a reason!" Troy tells her, shouting. "You never know which way you're going to-ahhh!"

They plunge down a steep drop just then, the flashing colors and illuminating lights making everything seem like an intergalactic journey. With Tomorrowland completed, they head back through Main Street U.S.A., where the parade's finally ended, and into Fantasyland, their final section of the day. It's hard to believe the day is already over, but it's pushing four-thirty as they walk through Cinderella's Castle to the tune of Cinderella herself singing, "_A dream is a wish your heart makes, when you're fast asleep. In dreams, you will lose your heartaches. Whatever you wish for you keep. Have faith in your dreams and someday, your rainbow will come smiling through. No matter how your heart is grieving, if you keep on believing, the dream that you wish will come true…_"

"I never get tired of that song," Annie sighs dreamily as they pass through the castle and by Bibbidi Bobbidi Boutique. "I wish I was still little, so I could get made up like a princess."

"You can still do it," Pierce tells her. "You'd look less ridiculous than these two in those gay hats."

He gestures towards Jeff and Britta, who frown. "Shut up Pierce. I'm _winning_. Any second now, Jeff will be taking off his hat. You'll see."

"Uh, no I won't," Jeff insists. "I'll wear this to the grave to prove I can do so. You'll take yours off sooner than I will."

"Oh my God, please stop this," Annie begs. "Let's go on It's A Small World! It's such a classic!"

"Oh I love that one!" Shirley agrees. "Britta, you'll love it too. All kinds of nationalities are represented in the dolls. I know how you love culture awareness."

"I do," She agrees. "Let's do it."

They wait through the short line, board their boat, and listen as the dolls sing and embrace their differences and similarities. "_It's a world of laughter, a world of tears. It's a world of hopes and a world of fears. There's so much that we share that it's time we're aware it's a small, small world! It's a small world after all. It's a small world after all. It's a small world after all. It's a small, small world!_"

"I can't deal with this song," Jeff complains. "I say we break into groups after this and catch up later. I'm not too big on these children's rides."

"Okay," Troy shrugs. "But we've done the entire park already except this part. I don't know what else we'd do."

When they exit the ride, Troy, Shirley, Britta, and Pierce head one way as Jeff, Annie, and Abed head another. The first group heads into the spectacular 3-D show Mickey's PhilharMagic and then off to Peter Pan's Flight, while the other group hits the other side of Fantasyland, where Winnie the Pooh and the Little Mermaid reign. Upon the end of Peter Pan, Troy sniffles and wipes his eyes, recovering from a mini-breakdown when he believed Wendy wouldn't make it out alive. "That was a close one guys," Troy says to his friends. "I cannot believe I'm the _only_ one who cried."

Pierce snickers. "Crying's for babies. You're a man, Troy. You shouldn't be crying over Disney."

"Hey, Disney can be really emotional, sometimes," Shirley defends as they enter the line for Snow White's Scary Adventures. "Like this one! When Prince Charming finally gave Snow White that kiss that woke her from the curse? I cried like a baby."

"Yeah, that's pretty good, but how about in Beauty and the Beast when you think Beast's dead, but he isn't really dead and then he gets transformed back into a human and he and Belle live happily ever after?" Troy points out excitedly. "Ugh. Gets me every time."

Pierce laughs. "That _is_ a good one! Guys, I know what movie you're talking about!"

"See? You're not as old as you think you are!" Shirley chuckles and only then notices Britta hasn't made _one_ comment on Disney princesses being degrading to women. "Britta? Are you okay? You've been really quiet this whole time."

"Yeah… It's just…" Britta sighs, not caring that now Troy and Pierce would also know her business. "I had so many chances today and I just didn't take them. Now we're back at the 'friend' place. And I don't want to be in the 'friend' place anymore."

"Aw pumpkin," Shirley says remorsefully and Troy nods.

"I did notice you two seemed much more normal today," He informs her. "But that's bad?"

"There's still time," Shirley assures her. "You can still get out of the 'friend' place. One of you just has to _do_ something about it. You can't keep fooling around- literally and figuratively."

"I know, I know, I just… Every time I go to say something, I chicken out," Britta sighs. "I am _so_ not that girl. Why am I such a high-schooler right now?"

"Hey, as a former high-schooler, I take offense at that," Troy says and none of them feel the need to point out they were _all_ high-schoolers, once. "And secondly, this thing can still be fixed. Just relax. No one's going to make fun of you for being that girl, Britta. Everyone has to be vulnerable eventually."

"Eloquent, Troy," Shirley nods her approval. "And he's right. Being vulnerable and putting ourselves out there is the only way we get what we want, believe me. It's a hell of a gamble, but it's always worth it in the end."

"Yeah," Britta says weakly and then much more confidently as their advice seems to be taking effect. "Yeah, you're right. Screw this cowardly crap. If I was half the strong and independent woman I pride myself in being, I'd just do it already!"

"That's the spirit!" Shirley claps excitedly. "So what are you waiting for?"

Britta points at their moving vehicle as if it's obvious. "Well, the ride has to end first."

"Oh… right."

A beat, and then Pierce asks, "What are we talking about, again?"

Meanwhile, on the other side of Fantasyland, Jeff, Annie and Abed, much to the former's chagrin, had ridden Cinderella's Golden Carousel, Dumbo the Flying Elephant, and the Many Adventures of Winnie the Pooh all before boarding their current attraction- the Mad Tea Party. They're spinning through Alice in Wonderland's magical world of tricks when Jeff begs the two to stop whirling their teacup because he's sure he'll be sick. Annie and Abed chuckle, call him a grandpa and depart the ride to find the park bathed in darkness. A few feet away, the Main Street Electrical Parade is going strongly and just moments away was the nightly Wishes Nighttime Spectacular.

The two are hand in hand and for some reason, it makes Jeff feel strangely lonely. Abed notices his look, being the most observant, and when the three pause for Annie's bathroom break, he says, "You can be as happy as us, you know. It isn't as difficult as you're making it out to be."

"No, it's just complicated," Jeff shrugs. "I don't want to ruin anything now that we're in the friend phase again."

"But don't you want to be with Britta?" Abed asks, confused.

Jeff thinks it over a moment. "Yeah, I do."

"And isn't Britta on this vacation with us?"

Rolling his eyes, Jeff responds, "Obviously."

"Then I don't see what's so complicated about it." Abed shrugs. "You tell her you're in love with her, she repeats the sentiment, fireworks explode, you make out. It's that simple."

"That simple, huh?" Jeff repeats. "First of all, how am I going to find her in this crowd?"

"Are you talking about Britta?" Annie asks, rejoining the conversation. "Text her and tell her to meet you by the castle. That's where the fireworks are going off, anyway."

"Are you joking?" Jeff exclaims. "There are five thousand people in front of the castle!"

Suddenly, the castle is illuminated with thousands of lights and a deep booming voice announces the Wishes Nighttime Spectacular is beginning. "When stars are born, they possess a gift or two. One of them is this- they have the power to make a dream come true."

"Here is your mission, should you choose to take it," Abed announces in a voice proper for Mission: Impossible. "Find Britta and tell her how you feel."

"Easier said than done," Jeff says as the three set off into the crowd.

"_When you wish upon a star, makes no difference who you are…_"

"Ooh, the fireworks are starting!" Shirley exclaims when they depart Cinderella's Golden Carousel. "Hurry up! We've got to get a good spot to stand!"

"I have to find Jeff," Britta insists. "And I'm never going to find him in this crowd."

"Never say never!" Troy tells her. "If there's one thing Justin Bieber's taught us…"

"Who the hell is Justin Beaver?" Pierce questions, but the other three ignore him.

"… _Anything your heart desires will come to you_…"

With fireworks exploding in the sky and illuminating the darkened crowded park, Jeff ambles through Fantasyland like a man on a mission and, frankly, he is. He's trying to figure out what it is about Britta that's making him this psychotic man trying to confess his feelings in public and in one of the cheesiest ways possible- during the fireworks show at Disney World in front of Cinderella's Castle. He doesn't know if he's love with Britta or just completely caught in the moment, but he's less concerned with the actual confession of the feelings than he is with trying to find her in this impossibly large, dense crowd…

"… _If your heart is in your dreams, no request is too extreme_…"

The fireworks are beautiful and crackling in her ears as Britta pushes through the crowd apologizing for getting in everyone's way mindlessly as she searches for Jeff blindly. She has no idea if he's even watching the fireworks; for all she knows, he could've gone back to the hotel to pack for their semi-early departure the next morning. A sinking feeling in her stomach proves she hopes this isn't the case and she continues on, searching for Jeff so she can finally rid herself of these feelings that are eating her up inside. She wishes there was an easier way, wishes they were alone, wishes they'd talked about this the other day, when suddenly, she spots him across the way and wishes for all of the courage in the world as she calls out to him, "Jeff!"

"… _When you wish upon a star as dreamers do_…"

Suddenly, Jeff hears his name across the crowd and looks up just in time to see Britta, in all her glory and still wearing those stupid Minnie ears, calling out for him. He grins, shouting, "Britta!" just as she gains closer and closer to where he's standing.

The booming fireworks are reflected in her eyes and she tucks a curl behind her ear, smiling shyly. "Hi."

And he grins, grins wider than he has in days, because here they are, two of the most messed up people on the planet, standing outside of Cinderella's Castle in Disney World as fireworks of all colors rocket into the sky to explode. It's possibly one of the most romantic settings around; couples all around the world wish for a moment like this, and yet the first thing he and Britta do is greet each other like old friends. He looks at her, _really_ looks at her, and takes in her cutoff shorts, her Egyptian-like sandals, the pink t-shirt they both hate even though she looks great in it, and everything that just makes Britta _Britta_, before saying, "Hi," and bringing her lips to his own.

"… _Fate is kind. She brings to those who love…_"

It figures that the moment they're supposed to spend talking starts out with them kissing, but hey, Britta's not complaining, here. When they pull apart, she's the first to speak, "I don't want to be friends anymore. Wait, that sounds really harsh and it's not what I meant. We're best friends; we'll always be best friends, but we need to be something more. I haven't stopped thinking about you since the other night, since you told me you had feelings. _I've_ had feelings, I _have_ feelings, and they are not going away. I think it's pretty safe to say that I'm probably falling in love with you."

She watches the relief flood over his face, but misinterprets this as fear and backpedals. "It's scary and it's weird and it's only caused me problems in the past, so it's okay if we're not on the same level. We may not even be in the same book, for all I know. I just had to get this out there because it's been _killing_ me and I can't sit with this burning secret anymore. But it's okay if you don't want to do this, like we can still be friends. I know we kind of fixed things today and it's great, because I hate when things are awkward, too, but-"

"Britta, calm down," Jeff halts her and Britta stops talking immediately. "Relax, crazy woman. We're on the same page."

"... _The sweet fulfillment of their secret longing_…"

"We are?" Britta questions, both in incredulity and relief.

"Of course," He tells her. "I have been feeling all kinds of strange since last year, since we ended things. I just felt like we weren't quite _finished_. And then this year was really tough, with everyone's romantic confusions and then the stuff with my therapy and my dad… and you've always been the one who's cared the most about my wellbeing. You've always been there to help me through everything and I want you to continue to be there in the future when I eventually meet the man again, because there's no _way_ I want to do that alone. You just understand me, Britta, and I really needed someone like that; someone who wants to help, but doesn't try to _fix_."

She smiles and Jeff continues. "Then at Shirley and Andre's wedding, with the whole thing about you not wanting to become your mother, it finally occurred to me that maybe you needed someone too. Someone who could be there for you while you wrestled your own demons and I just wanted to be that person, especially after everything you've done for me. And then we hooked up that night and all of these feelings, the ones I'd repressed all last year, just came flooding back and they were _not_ going away. They still haven't gone away, Britta. There's a reason we hooked up Thursday night and it's _not_ because we were drunk."

"So, I think it's fairly safe to say," Jeff concludes. "That I'm falling in love with you too."

"… _Like a bolt out of the blue, fate steps in and sees you through…_"

This time she reaches for him and two engage in an embrace that knocks both of their hats to the ground, so they call it a tie. Fireworks are exploding, both in the sky and between the two most stubborn members of the Greendale seven, as Mickey leads the rest of the gang at Cinderella's Castle in the ending verse of "When You Wish Upon A Star." Jeff and Britta are kissing like they've been separated for years, kissing as if their lives depended on it, kissing as though the world would end if they parted, but perhaps their world would. And from afar, the five members of their study group watch, with relief, as they embrace, argue about who fell for who first, and embrace again, knowing that finally the balance has been restored.

They'd all gotten something out of this trip; Abed had gotten days and days' worth of movie references, a behind-the-scenes look at the magic in films and in real life, and a more well-rounded understanding of who he was as a human being and his relationship to others. Troy had gotten a retreat in which he'd learned it was time to grow up, even though he'd always have Disney to return to, to be a child once more. Annie had received a week's worth of locales where her childlike Disney face and youthful past were welcomed with open arms. Pierce had been rewarded with a moment of youth and the memory of his younger years, while Shirley had come to the understanding that a week away from her boys not only provided her with enough fun for a lifetime but also with a more refined understanding of her role as a mother.

As for Jeff and Britta, they had truly found something magical- they had finally found their way to each other.

"… _When you wish upon a star, your dreams come true!_"

* * *

"Is that everything?" Troy asks Abed, who nods and moves to shut the trunk of their rented eight-passenger van.

"Annie's fifteen suitcases are in, so I think we're ready," He jokes and the brunette scoffs.

"Hey! I had to provide space for all of the extra t-shirts, so that's _your_ fault," She crosses her arms, climbing into the van and rolling her eyes at the sight of Jeff and Britta making out in the backseat. "I'm _not_ sitting back there. Nose game!"

"Oh, I'm not playing," Shirley comments from the driver's seat. "Since I'm driving first!"

Britta pulls away long enough to say, "You guys encouraged this, I hope you know."

"I'll sit back here with the lovebirds," Pierce rolls his eyes. "I'll take one for the team."

"Thanks Pierce," Abed winks, sitting in the middle, beside Annie as Troy takes the passenger seat.

Shirley glances back at the group and asks, "Is everyone in? Are we all ready to go?"

Annie nods sadly as Shirley begins to pull out of the parking lot and onto the highway. "This is so sad, you guys."

"It is, but now we can start planning our next adventure," Abed tells her. "I say we tackle Universal Studios, next."

"And Islands of Adventure!" Troy agrees. "We've _got_ to go to the Wizarding World of Harry Potter!"

"Ooh, I love Harry Potter!" Shirley squeals. "Sounds like fun!"

Annie, still mourning their Disney vacation, points at the looming purple arch their driving under. "And now it's officially over."

It hosts a waving Mickey with a message saying, "See ya real soon!" Everyone's quiet for a moment, remembering the great times they'd had in the past week as Pierce says, "This was one of the best vacations of my life. I wish it didn't end."

"Me too," Shirley says remorsefully. "I'm so sad it's over."

"We had so much fun!" Annie sighs.

Troy nods his agreement. "We did _so_ much in one week, but it went by so fast…"

Abed glances back at the purple arch, so tiny now, and says, "Vacation over."

Jeff and Britta, however, share a knowing glance and grin, knowing that even though their majestic Walt Disney World vacation had come to an end, something even more magical was just beginning.


End file.
